2017-12-19 11:38
Dear Kid,
Yesterday was Bake Cookies Day. So I did. (I’m so obedient.)
Since we have a gluten-free guest, I searched for a gluten-free recipe. This is easier than it sounds because the… Read More
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2017-12-18 11:34
Dear Kid,
Happy Bake Cookies Day!
Yes, it is the cookie baking time of year and someone decided to celebrate by creating a Day for The Baking of Cookies.
I read somewhere that there is no E… Read More
2017-12-15 11:47
Dear Kid,
There’s no use crying over spilled milk. One, because you can’t un-spill it and Two, because it’s milk.
There’s no use crying over spilled coffee either, bu… Read More
2017-12-14 11:46
Dear Kid,
Have you heard about this trend? Personally, I’m horrified, but apparently reindeer boob is an accepted thing.
In case you’re not as hip as I am, Allure Magazine says
… Read More
2017-12-13 11:45
Dear Kid,
Rather unexpectedly, I found myself in the middle of a discussion about meat. (For clarity’s sake, by “in the middle of” I mean I was listening to.)
Turns out som… Read More
2017-12-12 15:01
Dear Kid,
Winter has arrived. And I’m pretty sure Winter isn’t happy about ending his vacation in Aruba and getting to work.
I say this because it was face freezing, finger numbi… Read More
2017-12-11 11:49
Dear Kid,
There ought to be a law. There should probably be several, but right now I’m talking about one in particular.
Some issues are things we can agree to have differing opin… Read More
2017-12-08 11:45
Dear Kid,
Happy Friday!
Once upon a time (I do love a story that begins that way), there was no such thing as Casual Friday.
Finally, one day, Mrs. Joe Neanderthal decided that she was tired… Read More
2017-12-07 11:39
Dear Kid,
We were talking about the Ohio River at lunch yesterday.
NMore specifically, we were on a boat (the big kind where there’s neither wind nor destination) cruising on the Ohio… Read More
2017-12-06 11:41
Dear Kid,
You’ve heard of the Ohio River. But do you know about it?
Well, of course you do, but I’m going to tell you about it anyway.
The Ohio River springs into existence in Pi… Read More
2017-12-05 11:33
Dear Kid,
It’s December (you probably knew that, but it’s possible you weren’t paying attention). There’s a lot of focus on The Holiday Season at this time of year, b… Read More
2017-12-04 11:48
Dear Kid,
Just in case you weren’t paying attention, this past Saturday was National Mutt Day, a holiday to “raise awareness of the plight of mixed breed dogs in shelters.”… Read More
2017-12-01 11:37
Dear Kid,
Once upon a time, Mrs. Joe Neanderthal decided to throw a Fancy Dinner Party. While she cooked a large Rump of Mammoth, she sent Joe down to the corner to buy a couple of bottles o… Read More
2017-11-30 11:35
Dear Kid,
The conversation continued…
Puppy: And then we had to drive all the way home.
Me: It was a long drive, wasn’t it?
Puppy: It lasted my whole entire life.
Me: It lasted… Read More
2017-11-29 11:39
Dear Kid,
Puppy: Did I tell you about my trip?
Me: I’m pretty sure I was there with you.
Puppy: But it’s better when I tell it.
Me: I’m sure it is. What would you like to t… Read More
2017-11-28 11:21
Dear Kid,
Puppy: Do you want to hear about our trip?
Pi: I was on the trip. I was there.
Puppy: So I can tell you about it, right?
Pi: Sure, you tell me about it.
Puppy: First, we rode in th… Read More
2017-11-27 11:34
Dear Kid,
On Thanksgiving, we take a moment to focus, to appreciate all that is important. To reflect on the important things in life. To honor priorities. In short, to watch football.
There… Read More
2017-11-22 11:35
Dear Kid,
Recipe for Thanksgiving
1 turkey
1/2 gallon of gravy; zero lumps
1 dish of sweet potatoes
1 dish of mashed potatoes
Corn soufflé
Green beans with almonds
Roasted Brussel spr… Read More
2017-11-21 11:48
Dear Kid,
Sometimes it’s easy to be thankful. Like when it’s raining and someone offers to get the car and drive over to pick you up so you don’t have to walk through the p… Read More
2017-11-20 11:48
Dear Kid,
First of all, this rant is not about you. But if it applies to you sometime in the future, feel free to reread it.
Second of all, I looked it up. As in actual research (I’ll… Read More
2017-11-17 11:34
Dear Kid,
I’m simply not ready.
It just snuck up on me this year, and I’m not ready.
I’m not talking turkey, because Others are seeing to that this year. And I’m not… Read More
2017-11-16 11:43
Dear Kid,
Once upon a time, the world came to its senses and realized that smoking cigarettes was not cool.
Many, many efforts were made to get people to stop smoking (most of which didn&rsq&hell…Read More
2017-11-15 11:44
Dear Kid,
Tragedy!
Catastrophe!
Disaster and calamity!
Yesterday, the unthinkable happened.
I left my phone at home.
All day.
By itself.
Without me.
You know this because you tried to call… Read More
2017-11-14 11:48
Dear Kid,
What a fabulous success the Cincinnati Coffee Festival was. The venue was great, the vendors were wonderful, the crowds were spectacular, the music was top notch, the demos were in… Read More
2017-11-10 11:49
Dear Kid,
Just a quick note to let you know I’m thinking about you.
Mostly, we’re racing around getting everything ready for the weekend (CincinnatiCoffeeFestival.com) and convin… Read More
2017-11-09 11:37
Dear Kid,
What I Learned from My Brief (very) Stint (Ha!) as a Television Personality.
Some green rooms (the place you wait before you go “on”) are green. Some are not. Some gree… Read More
2017-11-08 11:49
Dear Kid,
There I was, happily working, typing away (I was once told I type mistakes per minute faster than almost anyone else) when a small notice popped up on the corner of my laptop. It s… Read More
2017-11-07 11:41
Dear Kid,
Me: Why do dogs turn around before they settle down to sleep?
Pi: That’s a good question.
Puppy: No it’s not.
Me: It’s not?
Puppy: No.
Pi: Why isn’t it a go… Read More
2017-11-06 11:33
Dear Kid,
To recap the weekend.
The Bengals. Painful. Just painful to watch. In case you missed it (be thankful), there was fighting—as in it looked like a hockey game broke out on the… Read More
2017-11-03 11:53
Dear Kid,
We’re busy getting ready for the Cincinnati Coffee Festival (the world’s coolest event November 11-12 at Cincinnati Music Hall–buy tickets here). Which means we a… Read More
2017-11-02 10:37
This was supposed to publish on 10/31 but apparently didn’t. So pretend it’s a day or two ago….
Dear Kid,
It’s Halloween!
I was going to write a blog about the best… Read More
2017-11-01 10:41
Dear Kid,
The tally:
14 ghosts
3 pirates
1 melted ice cream cone
2 roller skaters
A gaggle of witches
4 pumpkins
A graveyard of mummies, zombies, and vampires
5 super heroes
Too many princes… Read More
2017-10-30 10:45
Dear Kid,
Well it has been quite a weekend sports-wise.
The most important lesson we learned is It Ain’t Over ‘Til It’s Over also known as Play to the End.
Just about every… Read More
2017-10-28 10:55
Dear Kid,
Have you looked at a calendar? Of course you have, so you’re aware that next week is Halloween.
Also, you a student at Ohio University (motto: We’re here to celebrate H… Read More
2017-10-26 10:50
Dear Kid,
Did you ever have a time when the world just crashed in to you? There you are going along, pushing all reasonable boundaries and getting away with it, and WHAM! reality catches up… Read More
2017-10-25 10:39
Dear Kid,
Once upon a time, there was no such thing as peanut butter and jelly. This was known as the Pre-Lunch Period.
Even once peanuts were invented no one really cared or paid attention… Read More
2017-10-24 10:46
Dear Kid,
You’re living in central-north-east (more or less) Pennsylvania, and you should probably know more than a bit about the baby Penguins (who kept things waaaay to “intere… Read More
2017-10-23 11:57
Dear Kid,
Some things seem obvious.
The problem is that there are some things that are obvious AFTER coffee that are not so obvious BEFORE coffee.
Like not wearing a black shirt to cuddle th… Read More
2017-10-20 10:44
Dear Kid,
The other night I re-watched Guardians of the Galaxy (great movie) I AM GROOT. Which got me thinking about Guardians of the Galaxy II (good movie) I am Groot. Love that little dude… Read More
2017-10-19 10:44
Dear Kid,
Facts about The Penguins.
The Pittsburgh Penguins were founded in 1967—you weren’t alive then.
The Penguins name came from the nickname of their home rink, the Igloo, f… Read More
2017-10-18 10:32
Dear Kid,
What. Just. Happened?
Two minutes ago we were making sure the air conditioner was running full blast and now we’re burrowing under the comforter and wondering where the heati… Read More
2017-10-17 10:51
Dear Kid,
Tickets are available for the Cincinnati Coffee Festival and they’re selling like hotcakes.
This, of course, raises the question: Exactly how quickly do hotcakes sell? The bl… Read More
2017-10-16 10:40
Dear Kid,
As you probably remember, Dad spent much of the summer tending his vegetable gardens with the love and care usually reserved for offspring.
Because of all his hard work, we’v… Read More
2017-10-13 11:32
Dear Kid,
It’s Friday the 13th!!
If you need me, my black cat and I will be under a ladder checking our makeup in a broken mirror, after which we’ll go inside and open an umbrell… Read More
2017-10-12 10:41
Dear Kid,
Dear Puppy,
Take a look at the calendar. Take a look outside. Take a look at all the Pumpkin-Spice everythings.
It is Fall. And after Fall comes (some form of) winter.
Which means… Read More
2017-10-10 10:41
Dear Kid,
Today is the tenth day of the tenth month of the tenth year (assuming you started counting 10 years ago), so it seems appropriate to talk about the number 3.
Just kidding, the numb… Read More
2017-10-09 10:26
Dear Kid,
The things I do for you. Seriously. This is me going Above and Beyond in the Mom department.
I’ve been watching Big Bang Theory. There is an episode in which Penny tells Shel… Read More
2017-10-06 10:44
Dear Kid,
It’s World Smile Day!
World Smile Day is about the yellow smiley face (which has spawned a thousand emojis). But I think it should be about…wait for it…smiling… Read More
2017-10-05 10:49
Dear Kid,
Once upon a time (or for all I know, two or three times upon a time) Hannibal was getting ready to cross the Alps.
He decided to take soldiers because they fight better than hairdr… Read More
2017-10-04 10:43
Dear Kid,
I have been watching too much HGTV. Mostly tiny house shows.
I am fascinated with these homes that are smaller than a refrigerator. I don’t want one, mind you, but I’m… Read More
2017-10-03 10:46
Dear Kid,
There is nothing worse than wanting to go to sleep and not being able to.
Of course, that’s not at all true. There are plenty of things that are worse than not being able to… Read More
2017-10-02 10:46
Dear Kid,
Happy October! And what a wonderful month October is.
October is (often) a month of perfect weather. Not too hot, not too cold. Chilly without being frozen—just right to warm… Read More
2017-09-29 10:45
Dear Kid,
It’s National Coffee Day.
By all rights, the banks should be closed, all offices and schools should be off, and tickertape parades should be held in celebration.
Wait. Cancel… Read More
2017-09-28 10:45
Dear Kid,
I saw a statistic recently that said 43% of college students consider dropping out of school.
Frankly, I don’t believe it.
Maybe I’m naïve, but I don’t belie… Read More
2017-09-27 10:45
Dear Kid,
September is National Courtesy Month.
Not that you’d know it from listening to the national discourse.
Seems to me we’ve reached a new low in the way we treat each othe… Read More
2017-09-26 10:34
Dear Kid,
“None of these leaves are good?”
As far as helpful conversations went, that was right up there with “Hot enough for ya’?” and “Hey, you’re… Read More
2017-09-25 11:51
Dear Kid,
There I was, happily working away. Calmly. (And by “calmly” I meant playing solitaire while I tried to figure out what to write next.) Minding my own business. (And by… Read More
2017-09-22 10:40
Dear Kid,
IT’S FALL!
You can tell because it’s 90 degrees and the air conditioning is running full blast.
Also, the calendar says so.
We expect labels to make sense and sometimes… Read More
2017-09-21 10:48
Dear Kid,
Did you set your alarm?
Do you have your keys?
What about your lunch? Did you take your lunch?
Don’t run with scissors.
Once it’s on the internet, it’s there for… Read More
2017-09-20 10:49
Dear Kid,
Over the years, you’ve had lots of new (temporary) homes–and we’ve been there to help you settle in to all of them.
We took you to see your new classroom and meet… Read More
2017-09-19 10:44
Dear Kid,
Any requests for dinner this week?
Nope.
Anything you don’t make yourself so you want to have before you go?
Not really.
Chicken? Fish? Grilled cheese?
Whatever you want is f… Read More
2017-09-18 10:43
Dear Kid,
What are you watching on TV?Football Game 1. Football Game 2. Football Game 3. And a James Bond movie.
All of them?Yeah (duh).
Pick one.I’m watching all of them.
Choose a cha… Read More
2017-09-15 10:56
Dear Kid,
Just in case you weren’t sure, coffee is a big thing.
Not just in my world, but across the galaxy.
“Coffee: the finest organic suspension ever devised.” Kathryn J… Read More
2017-09-14 10:46
Dear Kid,
It’s the 14th in honor of which I present 14 (more or less) facts about the number fourteen.
Fourteen is the number of forgetfulness.
Huh? Who knew there had to be a number f… Read More
2017-09-13 10:41
Dear Kid,
Puppy: That’s the school bus.
Me: Yes.
Puppy: It doesn’t stop here anymore.
Me: No, it doesn’t.
Puppy: It used to stop here.
Me: Yes.
Puppy: Doesn’t it like… Read More
2017-09-12 10:45
Dear Kid,
It’s official. We the People have lost our collective minds. We have crossed the line. Stepped over the invisible barrier. Gone a bridge too far.
We have pumpkin-spiced every… Read More
2017-09-11 10:45
Dear Kid,
Being sick has its advantages. Like you get caught up on what the insides of your eyelids are doing.
And you get to contemplate the little things. Like: Should I turn over? I think… Read More
2017-09-08 10:37
Dear Kid,
Some surprises are wonderful. Like a child coming home to visit unexpectedly or finding out that you really like cucumber ice cream.
Other surprises, not so much.
Coming downstairs… Read More
2017-09-07 10:49
Dear Kid,
Have you ever really listened to one of the commercials for a specialized medication?
Near the end of the commercial (in rapidly read fine print), the voice over says, “Tell… Read More
2017-09-06 10:48
Dear Kid,
It’s a darn good thing I pay attention. Otherwise, the world might tilt off its axis and head off in the wrong direction.
Also, people might use words incorrectly without bei… Read More
2017-09-05 10:51
Dear Kid,
It’s the 5th. So I thought it would be a good idea to share 5 cool things about the number 5.
But I can’t. Because there are too many funky facts about five to limit it… Read More
2017-09-01 10:44
Dear Kid,
September is Happy, Healthy Cat Month.
Really.
While many cats favor grumpiness or condescension, some cats favor happy (along with their condescension or grumpitude).
We don&rsquo&hell…Read More
2017-08-31 12:04
Dear Kid,
It is not easy to write to you while we’re watching Guardians of the Galaxy (Part II). Especially when we’re watching it without commercials.
And yawning.
Somehow, &ldq&hell…Read More
2017-08-30 10:41
Dear Kid,
I’m exhausted. Fatigued, tired, beat, bushed, and out of synonyms.
You understand this because you napped for about 32 hours yesterday.
As I sit here (yawning), I started thi… Read More
2017-08-29 10:46
Dear Kid,
Puppy: Scratch me.
Me: You’ll have to wait a few minutes.
Puppy: Scratch me.
Me: I’m busy. You’ll have to wait a few minutes.
Puppy: Scratch me!
Pi: What are you… Read More
2017-08-28 10:46
Dear Kid,
Peanuts aren’t nuts, they’re legumes. Which pretty much everyone knows.
Cashews aren’t nuts, they’re seeds. Which pretty much no one knows (except those pay… Read More
2017-08-25 10:39
Dear Kid,
I recently took a left turn at peanut butter and fell head first into cashew butter.
So (obviously) I thought I should investigate cashews (and by “investigate” I mean… Read More
2017-08-24 10:46
Dear Kid,
The thing about cats is that they know they’re in charge.
Whether they’re eating lasagna or refusing to eat anything, cats are quite sure they rule the world. Today the… Read More
2017-08-23 10:41
Dear Kid,
It will not surprise you to learn that I’ve been watching America’s Got Talent.
It will not surprise you to learn that I have opinions. Both general and specific.
There… Read More
2017-08-22 10:50
Dear Kid,
The other night you were watching an XMen movie. I was watching women’s gymnastics.
Haley Graham: [V.O.] Elite gymnastics is like Navy SEALs, only harder. There are like, 200… Read More
2017-08-21 10:23
Dear Kid,
There’s going to be an eclipse today. Perhaps you’ve heard?
Not only do we live in a time where information is shared with blincding speed, we live in an age in which W… Read More
2017-08-18 10:46
Dear Kid,
I’ve been watching too much tiny house TV. I’ve been watching the shows where they build tiny homes and the shows where people hunt for existing tiny homes. Who knew th… Read More
2017-08-17 10:43
Dear Kid,
I now have some perspective.
(Yeah, that’s not entirely true. But I have had a few hours’ sleep and I was just too worn out to write and reflect after the game.)
Sooooo… Read More
2017-08-16 10:43
Dear Kid,
The things I don’t know continue to astound me.
For example, I didn’t know that the golf balls at Top Golf are microchipped and are therefore smarter than I am.
I didn… Read More
2017-08-15 10:43
Dear Kid,
Somehow, someway, we (and by “we” I mean you) managed to defy the odds, conquer the technology, and procure tickets to tonight’s FC Cincinnati game.
The fabulous… Read More
2017-08-14 10:47
Dear Kid,
All of the squirrels in our backyard are connoisseurs of the bird feeder (and by connoisseurs I mean they will eat any and all seeds that fall to the ground). Most of them have tri… Read More
2017-08-11 10:46
Dear Kid,
The thing about raisins is they have a boatload of calories crammed into a tiny little bit of yum. But there are many reasons to eat raisins in addition to the yum.
Raisins contain… Read More
2017-08-10 10:35
Dear Kid,
Based on hours of scientific research, I can conclusively say that (most) raisins do not wear white gloves and sing Motown.
Which is unfortunate, because those guys were adorable… Read More
2017-08-09 10:40
Dear Kid,
It’s Book Lover’s Day again!
Once upon a time, members of congress pretended to read (these days, they don’t bother reading anything with more than 140 characters… Read More
2017-08-08 10:39
Dear Kid,
I’ve been reading about kola nuts. Turns out that kola nuts are The Next Great Thing. Unless they are the Retro New Thing.
You know about the kola nut from Coca-Cola which or… Read More
2017-08-07 10:40
Dear Kid,
Ok, quick. Name three things you can’t do while weeding.
Eat.h
True. Unless you count the occasional rogue mosquito.
That’s one. Name a second.
Get eaten by a hippopota… Read More
2017-08-04 10:43
Dear Kid,
Happy Friday! And Happy International Beer Day!
Didn’t know it was International Beer Day? Then it’s a good thing you have me.
There are three major classifications of… Read More
2017-08-03 10:39
Dear Kid,
A friend of mine was in a dog fight. Not the cool, imaginary Snoopy and the Red Baron kind. A real, go to the hospital and have a boatload of stitches kind.
The bad part is that t… Read More
2017-08-02 11:32
Dear Kid,
I went out to car the other day, and there—in the grocery store parking lot—was a car with this bumper sticker:
My first thought was, “How cool is it that someon… Read More
2017-08-01 10:46
Dear Kid,
Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit and Happy August.
It seems (to me) appropriate to use a lot of capital letters as we head into the a Month of Transition.
August is a Month of Transitio… Read More
2017-07-31 10:59
Dear Kid,
It will not stun you to learn that while Dad and Pi went on a 56 mile bike ride yesterday, I didn’t.
I spent some time outside…wait for it…weeding. Since I&rsqu&hell…Read More
2017-07-28 10:42
Dear Kid,
Have you ever gone a while without talking to someone and then you pick up right where you left off, weeks, or months, or years earlier?
Recently, I met up with a friend I hadn&rsq&hell…Read More
2017-07-27 10:32
Dear Kid,
If you had been around in 1940 (you weren’t) and if you’d been paying attention (you probably would have been looking in the other direction), you might have been aware… Read More
2017-07-26 10:47
Dear Kid,
The other day I told you about the coffees we tried at La Terza. What I didn’t tell you about was the cascara we drank there.
“The what?” you say. So glad you ask… Read More
2017-07-25 10:25
Dear Kid,
Have you been watching American Ninja Warrior? Probably not.
I could give you a play-by-play, but it would probably sound something like this:
What? Seriously? OMG! How do these pe… Read More
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