2020-07-07 15:14
Time waits for no mouse.Though the mice and the men make the greatest of plans,We can't fashion the fate which is out of our hands.We can add up the numbers and circle a date,But frustration… Read More
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Deformed Monks Of Cumberton Blog
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The Deformed Monks of Cumberton share their unique views of the world through word, music and video. Head of the ancient order, Brother Biscuit-Banjo, feels now is the time to finally break the silence and share the monks centuries of wisdom with the outside world.
2020-06-30 15:30
Four times Four.I think I see the horsemen come,We have to turn the final page.It's pointless now to turn and run,From sixteen legged violent rage.We had to turn the final page,The ending ca… Read More
2020-06-04 14:20
HomeI need to find myself a home.To start I'll need my own full stop.I want to use my own front door,By turning round my perfect key.I'll put my things just where I like,I'll paint it black… Read More
2020-05-28 19:03
Virtual Pain.It's true that life is easier with our technology,But here's a glimpse inside my world, how things can often be.Sometimes I fucking hate my phone, I want to cave it in,I'd use a… Read More
2020-05-18 17:27
A recipe for disaster.If you think that it's easy to write then you're wrong,Why don't you have a go? Why don't you make a song?You will first need some chords. Are there many you know?Three… Read More
2020-05-09 13:37
Do Monsters Watch?Do monsters watch the human race?If so, de we both look the same?Could there be life in outer space?Could they have bum cheeks on their face?And would each have a crazy nam… Read More
2020-05-06 10:31
WARNINGmAY CONTAIN INFERENCE OF RUDENESS.bROTHER bISCUIT-bANJO. Saucy Books.I've come now to appreciate,Erotic bits of books.The cunning writer reels you in,With rows of randy hooks.Strateg… Read More
2020-05-02 19:58
The Fly.Curse it's constant buzzing sound,Tiny fly pasts round and round.Lands then waits 'til you forget,Back again but he'll regret,Entering my sacred space,Waving arms I shout and chase… Read More
2020-05-01 18:52
The Ballad of Boredom.I'm starting to get lonely now,And boredom comes to see.It's something that I can't allow,He can't catch up with me.I've tried to keep his hands at bay,To occupy mysel… Read More
2020-04-27 16:42
As the monks self-isolate, Brother Binky has decided to write a series of poems in a genre he is calling, "Mundane Poetry".Here is the first.Stay safe, and we hope that these words will help… Read More
2020-04-27 16:40
Here is the second in Brother Binky's "MundanePoetry" series.We hope you enjoy. It has put Brother Dribblystick off using our shower.Brother Biscuit-Banjo.The surprising showerOnce again th… Read More
2020-04-27 16:39
Here is the latest in Brother Binky's series of, "Mundane poetry".Stay safe, and stay inside.Brother Biscuit-Banjo.And repeat.I try to fill my empty days, I cook,I write, I exercise, at leas… Read More
2020-04-27 16:37
Here is the fourth poem in Brother Binky's series of, "Mundane poetry".We hope his words bring you some comfort in these strange times.Brother Biscuit-Banjo.Everything is better in pastry.I… Read More
2020-04-27 16:35
Brother Binky thought that you might be interested to know that his latest poem is written in Iambic Pentameter with a Spondee at the end of every other line.Everyone loves a Spondee.Brothe… Read More
2020-04-27 16:25
Multiple Poetsonality Disorder.As I sit on my chair with a poem to write,I invoke inspiration to visit my words,I'm aware that my poems are mostly absurd,So I beg for a gift so my wrongs be… Read More
2018-06-27 13:11
Brother Biscuit-Banjo:We have suspected for some time that the Domino army had enlisted help from outside their trusted ranks in a bid to fast track their global domination. Last week, Brot… Read More
2018-04-10 12:28
Brother Biscuit-Banjo: - Just a warning that Brother Binky's poem does contain some strong language. The Domino war is taking it'S toll on him. FUCKING BUILDERSA swarming breed, the b… Read More
2017-07-31 13:45
A shocking vista reaches out where hundreds now lay dead.The red and blue on one side where the strings of cheese have spread.The other side an open grave with fallen monks at rest.The bitte… Read More
2017-07-24 12:50
Let me begin with begging your forgiveness for our silence, it was not of our choosing.We have just returned from playing our part in a holy war. It is not a war you will have heard of, and… Read More
2016-11-04 14:37
The band Travis once asked..."Why does it always rain on me?"Answer - Travis were from Scotland.Another one of life's big questions unravelled by Brother Driblystick Read More
2016-11-04 14:36
Bob Dylan once asked...."How many roads must a man walk down, before you can call him a man?"Answer - I was once lucky enough to visit Mr Dylan whilst travelling the spirit world. It turns o… Read More
2016-04-05 11:01
Peppers Can't Be Real I looked at a pepper so bright and smooth,They don't look real, but I can't prove,That they were forged by outside force,By alien life, or God of course.There's somethi… Read More
2016-03-07 19:26
This is what happens when you ask Brother Fingers to leave a note for the milkman Read More
2016-02-25 15:09
Brother Fingers expresses his feelings about Justin Bieber in his new song Read More
2015-11-06 17:44
An exciting moment in Cumberton history as Brother Driblystick makes first contact with the Cumberton Buddha Read More
2015-10-10 17:31
ThisI told Brother Binky to use the plug when he shaves to save water Read More
2015-09-30 09:12
What a man?Always pay my money to the tax man.Talk to me like I'm a hippy yeah man.  &hell…Read More
2015-09-22 11:03
This is the earliest record we have of the origins of Cumberton.It details how the first man found his way to the new land and what he found there.The story lasts for about 25 minutes, so ge… Read More
2015-09-09 14:44
Like all the monks here at Cumberton, Brother Fingers was once a normal man. The Deformed monk inside can come to the surface at any time, and for Brother Fingers it was the ice bucket chall… Read More
2015-09-03 10:32
2015-06-28 16:15
2015-06-27 15:27
THE YELLOW QUANDRYIs butter good, or butter bad?And what's the best I ever had?A full fat block that's full of salt?But then we're told that salt's at fault. &nb&hell…Read More
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