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Hammer Of The Blogs Blog
"Political language -- and with variations this is true of all political parties, from Conservatives to Anarchists -- is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to pure wind." -- George Orwell, Politics and the English Language
American Carnage
2021-01-13 06:32
And crows will eat your eyes. -- Motörhead, Traitor I promise that I don't intend to make a habit of breaking radio silence, especially just a couple weeks after making a show of pullin… Read More
2020-12-31 23:38
This is one of those weird, harmless, funny stories making the rounds this week:  apparently Alec Baldwin's wife has been engaging in some sort of long-running Andy Kaufman performance… Read More
2020-12-30 18:13
I get why articles such as this consistently approach the stories from the "race" angle. I do get it, and it's certainly an important element. But an even more important element, which goes… Read More
2020-12-28 23:17
Fintan O'Toole has been making a name for himself this year with his scathing, pithy essays on our collapsing empire, and the doddering oaf we chose to run it the past half decade. His newes… Read More
2020-12-28 17:42
Now this is the good stuff I'm gonna miss. Just inject it right into my veins!After going through what some called a scripted monologue that also featured interjections from Guilfoyle, Trum… Read More
2020-12-23 20:59
Story time, kids -- pretty sure I have not told this one before, if I have it was years ago. After sixteen years, the Blogheimers is kicking in with some regularity.So back in the mid-'70s… Read More
2020-12-15 18:31
Opus Dei anal cyst Bill Barr, whose dad was a teen-diddler and who had Jeffrey Epstein murdered in prison and all the seized Trump-incriminating evidence destroyed, has been fired for refusi… Read More
2020-12-13 07:30
It's depressing to consider the fact that nearly half the country looked around at the mass death, chaos, and general failure, and collectively said yeah, I want four more years of that. Now… Read More
2020-12-11 19:41
Here is your dystopian future:  a hopelessly addled, embittered old man, brain permanently marinated in a bottomless vat of Cutty Sark, vaingloriously attempting to failsplain to Teh Ki… Read More
2020-12-03 17:02
As irony goes, this is pretty much "crystallize it, crush it, chop it, snort it, and stay up for a month" grade shit:  Georgia Governor Brian Kemp, who as Secretary or State rigged the… Read More
2020-11-04 01:40
I think there have been instances in the past where I've indulged in some Kanye West smackdown, and some commenters have thought I'm kidding or riffing.Folks, if you believe nothing else I'v… Read More
2020-11-02 22:24
Remember back in 2008, when a worthless piece of shit tried to bamboozle anyone who was dumb enough to listen that a couple of giant knee-grows mugged her, held her down and carved a reverse… Read More
2020-11-02 18:21
I carry a bunch of anger with me. Who I carry it for rotates. -- Daniel Woodrell, Give Us a KissPeople are apparently getting "anxious" in the final hours, and while it's understandable it's… Read More
2020-11-01 06:57
People look to me and say, "Is the end near? Is this the final day? What's the future of mankind?" How would I know? I got left behind. Everyone goes through changes, looking to find the t… Read More
2020-10-20 21:23
Not going to waste much time or effort on this, because he really isn't worth it, but it is a fine larf to see some of the usual dopes entreating us to "be best" or whatever, with Rush Limba… Read More
2020-10-16 03:47
Imagine being such a waste of oxygen, such a completely desiccated soul, that your idea of an insult is to compare someone with Fred Rogers.Had enough winning yet, America? Are you better of… Read More
2020-10-15 22:36
I'd be happy to #BoycottNBC, but aside from Sunday night football, I never watch it. I couldn't name three shows on that network if you put a gun to my head.That said, I mean, come on. Just… Read More
2020-10-14 22:28
As penance for their miserable collective performance over, oh, let's say this past decade just to be charitable about it, for every one of these tiresome missives, there needs to be at leas… Read More
2020-10-13 07:30
The religious fanaticism is only part of Judge Handmaid's problem. Her willingness to undo every meaningfully liberal piece of legislation in the past seventy years is just another part of t… Read More
2020-10-13 06:50
Oh brother, here we go again:  boy is Doctor Fauci angry with Trump's disrespect and lying now. Ooh, you can just feel the palpating fury and seething resentment, can't you? Yeah, baby… Read More
2020-10-06 22:06
Lost in the narrowed bandwidth of the corporate "broadcasting" channels was the secretly recorded call between Melanoma Tramp and her former sidekick, Stephanie Something-Or-Other-Who-Fuckin… Read More
2020-10-05 21:20
As monstrous and awful as Exxon's corporate strategy is, it is also horrifically rational from their point of view, as long as people insist on consuming what they're selling, as much as pos… Read More
2020-10-05 20:08
It's good to see that at least some of the coal miners that Trump catered to bullshitted in 2016 are seeing the light. Better late than never. Welcome aboard the reality train.What's importa… Read More
2020-10-05 02:00
Since we love to live in nostalgia -- that is, the fond misrecollections of an exaggerated past -- this whole year has been a fine reminder of the protracted collapse of the Soviet Union dur… Read More
2020-10-01 21:35
Paul Campos at LGM has a post about the prospects of an actual slide into authoritarianism post-election, and despite my vacillations over the past few months, I actually tend to share that… Read More
2020-10-01 18:03
I get the complaint, but honestly, I don't see the problem here:The Agriculture Department last week began mandating that millions of boxes of surplus food for needy families include a lett… Read More
The White House Dog
2020-10-01 16:30
 I swear before everything unholy and profane that, as sure as I am sitting here, this ad was going to end with a long, lingering shot of Lindsey Graham Read More
2020-09-28 19:10
There's no better gravy for the soul than delusion. -- A.R. Moxon, The RevisionariesJust when you're ready to write off the Times, they go and surprise you by doing something useful. Obvious… Read More
2020-09-28 17:46
Interesting take on the the Q-ball "phenomenon." Like just about everything else, it makes sense in a weird way that this dopey, disjointed viral narrative -- which really doesn't even quali… Read More
2020-09-20 16:57
Look at this ridiculous bullshit posturing as news. Fuck these people, and everyone who still supports it. Boycott them all. Demand better Read More
2020-09-19 20:29
We all knew the day was coming, we just didn't know when. The only surprise is that it wasn't, you know, on Election Day or something like that.Hell, it could have been a week after Election… Read More
2020-09-19 04:25
Come 2030, only the rats will be happy. -- Stephen King, 1922The Holocaust is not only history, but warning. -- Timothy Snyder, Black EarthOne hears the clatter, as the corporate media valia… Read More
2020-09-16 06:04
The popular phrase in preventing the smug assumption that Biden will beat the evil clown in a landslide, even though he clearly should beat that failed attempt at a functioning human being b… Read More
2020-09-10 22:33
I get what Martin is saying here, and agree with it as far as it goes. But this election is no longer a referendum on Trump and his motley band of dumbfellas. It's a referendum on us, pure a… Read More
2020-09-10 02:22
Of course Trump knew. Did anyone really need Bob Woodward to sit on that amazing revelation for seven months to come to that realization?(I hope every meal Woodward eats for the rest of his… Read More
2020-09-09 22:16
Great article and interview from Luke O'Brien here that pretty much encapsulates the student-loan debt crisis. You know, if JoeMala are looking to gin up some enthusiasm amongst the youngs… Read More
2020-09-07 05:01
Next to the Chump Armada at the bottom of Lake Travis, this is the funniest thing I've seen in a while. Gilbert Gottfried reading the lyrics to Cardi B's WAP Read More
2020-09-05 23:16
Interesting thread here, food for thought. We're not there yet, but we are clearly on that path. Best case scenario -- Biden wins in a landslide, Dems increase lead in House and retake the S… Read More
2020-09-05 17:38
Everybody has read the article by now, and absolutely nobody is surprised. Maybe it will move the needle a touch, but probably not, which is the real story.Maybe he's right -- maybe people w… Read More
2020-09-04 03:38
If the Pelosi salon thing lasts longer than twenty-four hours in the endless spin cycle, then this hollowed-out husk of a state deserves to go under, full stop. In the meantime, "I got set u… Read More
2020-09-01 18:53
There's at least one of these assholes in every town:A Black girl was beaten and harassed by a boy in an apparently racially motivated attack in Kansas.Brandi Stewart said her 11-year-old da… Read More
2020-08-30 07:24
I love great comedy and comedians almost as much as I love great music and musicians. Growing up on a steady diet of (mostly) black comedians who would say literally anything to make people… Read More
2020-08-29 19:04
Great long-read in Vanity Fair on the origins and current issues with law enforcement fraternal orders, which are not unions in the usual sense, but are conflated with them because they hand… Read More
2020-08-26 07:17
The most interesting question to ask someone in charge of the RNC -- assuming there is someone at least nominally coordinating this hilarious dumpster fire -- regarding cancelled speaker Mar… Read More
2020-08-25 17:31
You know, it's sad and annoying that a black Democrat would shill for Trump, but you know, Vernon Jones has been a known shithead for quite some time, a true DINO. Clean your fucking barn ou… Read More
2020-08-25 06:33
You think Gavin Newsom ever looks back on when he was hitched to this goofy broad and thinks, Jesus, I dodged a fuckin' bullet?Back in those days, it was our Sunday morning ritual to pick up… Read More
2020-08-23 04:36
Throughout the summer, I've been thinking a great deal about the various opportunities we have managed to collectively squander -- chances to rethink fundamental assumptions about "how" "thi… Read More
2020-08-22 20:25
I'm not worried that Kanye's stupid stunt "campaign" is going to siphon a significant number of votes from Biden -- if it does, we're done anyway, we just don't know it, but this sounds a he… Read More
2020-08-21 21:59
When you get out of high school and start experiencing the real world -- jobs, vehicles, girlfriends, responsibilities, ambitions, ideas about who you are and who you want to be -- you start… Read More
2020-08-21 20:11
The ongoing national shitcom took a turn for the hilarious yesterday with the arrest and indictment of Meth Uncle Stevie B, along with several other shitheads, in a transparent money launder… Read More
Yes Please
2020-08-17 21:32
Get a load of this fuckin' maroon:So, I don't know who gets to break the bad news to the Commander o' Books, but even in a severe economic contraction, the People's Republic still accounts f… Read More
The Little Engine That Wouldn't
2020-08-14 21:14
I like Ted Lieu, I really do. (And yes, I am aware that that sounds like a Dr. Seuss couplet.) But he does not seem to take seriously the ramifications of his own words. Trump has made it cl… Read More
2020-08-12 04:53
So Biden's veep pick is Kamala Harris, and it's not just a selection I can "live with," but I actually like her a great deal. Since I knew it wouldn't be Liz Warren, I was hoping for either… Read More
Slope Of Enlightenment
2020-08-11 06:47
It would be difficult to put a number on just how many collective hours and column inches have been dedicated to assessing the various and sundry cognitive failings of one Jenius Q. Dealmake… Read More
2020-08-08 18:14
Good morning sunshine, the earth says hello! Today's fresh outrage is that the nation's bumbling, stumbling excuse for a flagship newspaper "accidentally" tweeted yet another stupid, empiric… Read More
2020-08-08 06:46
Christ, he's such a fucking pussy:“It was a disappointing meeting,” declared top Senate Democrat Chuck Schumer, saying the White House had rejected an offer by House Speaker Nanc… Read More
2020-08-07 06:15
Let's thump the deceased equine one last time for good measure -- if you're buying his music, or his clothes, or any of the other cheap, shitty garbage marketed by Kanye or his hobbit wife o… Read More
2020-08-07 05:30
However this movie ends -- and while my prediction wavers week-to-week, I think Biden squeaks through, though it will definitely get much uglier regardless -- it seems we may owe ol' Fuckfac… Read More
2020-08-01 22:18
Lately I find myself thinking back frequently to a classic Norm Macdonald bit, about a homeless guy who has a dog with him. (Bear in mind that the bit is about thirty years old, and I don't… Read More
2020-07-31 04:39
I had been wondering earlier in the week if Herman Cain, who had been hospitalized since shortly after attending Orange Foolius' COVID rally in Tulsa last month, was getting better or worse… Read More
2020-07-20 07:25
Hoarse Whisperer has been one of my favorite reads on Twitter for some time now, and this post is one reason why, because I've made the exact same point before, just from the opposite angle… Read More
2020-07-20 07:12
If it is necessary to turn the country into a cemetery in order to pacify it, I will not hesitate to do so. -- Colonel Carlos Manuel Arana Osorio, President of Guatemala, 1970-1974If you had… Read More
2020-07-15 07:32
I suppose the big "news" of the day is the back-to-back resignations of Bari Weiss and Andrew Sullivan, from the NY Times and New York Magazine respectively. I assume they are either going t… Read More
2020-07-15 05:44
Not really questions, so much as a suggestion and an observation.Suggestion:  Maybe one of these reportin' types, when asking Trump or one his bootlicking toadies about the prospect of… Read More
2020-07-13 05:40
I don't plug a lot of things (giggity), but when I do, I bloody well mean it, so listen up:  Don Winslow is an outstanding author and a great American. There are worse ways to learn abo… Read More
2020-07-10 04:30
This disjointed, rambling "interview" with 'murka's most notorious celeb mental patient -- well, he's not a "patient" in the sense of actually receiving treatment, but he's clearly ill and n… Read More
2020-07-04 17:15
So here's an interesting dynamic, becoming more and more commonplace:Trump breaks the routine tedium of saying and doing stupid things, and selling out American troops and foreign policy, et… Read More
2020-07-04 00:41
The more you read about the details of Elijah McClain's murder, the more unsettling it really is, both in the crime itself, and the larger picture entailed by it. I had no idea that ketamine… Read More
2020-06-28 21:46
I parked my truck and sat in the gallery during the morning session of the legislature. I watched the regard with which Bobby Earl was treated by many of his peers, the warm handshakes, the… Read More
2020-06-28 21:42
You sell your oldest friends, you sold your countrymenAnd yet we know your name....  Motörhead, TraitorI long ago gave up on the New York Times, and I still think the daily harm th… Read More
2020-06-26 05:31
These days, I can't really muster the energy necessary to get too boiled about this sort of shit, mainly because it is entirely expected. I wish I lived in Pelosi's district, so I could vote… Read More
2020-06-24 05:35
Because the US has a constant surplus of genuinely stupid, credulous dupes who rilly rilly care about shit, but simply cannot be bothered enough to find out whether it's even true or not, th… Read More
2020-06-24 04:35
It is going on six years since my dad passed away, and in that time Father's Day has increasingly become a time not only where I have the expected overall feeling of missing him, but thinkin… Read More
2020-06-21 07:01
Looks like the Jonestown comeback rally at Tulsa's Sad Trombone Feed Lot didn't go quite as expected. Instead of a million attendees, looks like a million lulz showed up, along with a couple… Read More
2020-06-16 05:26
Since we're all "reopening" the wage-slave service economy now, plague be damned, you can probably start the countdown to the next elite mediot haunted diner safari to lecture us all for the… Read More
2020-06-12 04:13
Here's an idea for all the confederate crybabies who are seething as their racist totems get toppled, one by one by miserable one:  what if -- and I'm just spitballing here, mind you … Read More
2020-06-11 05:56
I don't know if the question that launched this Twitter thread is apocryphal or just insufferably clueless, but it's a great rundown of practical, objective, empirical examples of why we ass… Read More
2020-06-07 19:01
If you're tired of bearing witness to this sort of ongoing bullshit, you have but one option, and it's a horrendously slim chance at best:  vote.And it's even worse than that, takes mor… Read More
2020-06-07 18:48
Read this thread, and try to picture the fuckers doing this shit -- shoving old people to the asphalt, shooting teenage girls in the eye with rubber bullets, "lighting up" people for the hig… Read More
2020-05-31 17:37
American society has fallen under a series of collective madnesses, all of them perpetuated by the people who profit from them. This is all quite out in the open, but people ha… Read More
2020-05-29 21:04
I've seen the entire Sopranos series cycle several times, but it's been at least five years or so since the last time. One minor story arc that keeps popping up in my mind lately, as I obser… Read More
2020-05-29 06:03
There is something deeply, ludicrously ironic in the spectacle of Big Pussy using his favorite superpower to try to strong-arm Twitter into letting his lies go unchecked. It's as if it doesn… Read More
2020-05-28 00:49
Who you gonna believe -- the lying fascist thugs in their paramilitary gear, or your lyin' eyes?This is a predictable outcome of a chief executive literally telling cops to bang heads and tu… Read More
2020-05-28 00:27
It's a very strange ongoing phenomenon to observe, on at least weekly and sometimes daily basis, not just the constant lies, personal attacks, innuendo, and outright slander and libel, but t… Read More
2020-05-27 14:25
Let's say you wanted to undermine an entire country. You would start by building your own base of power, and consolidate that base by creating a world for them that separated them from empir… Read More
Do Not Resuscitate, Part 3:  Comorbidities
2020-05-25 07:30
The rest of this benighted year will feature countless where do we go from here? thinkpieces, again none of which will explore the possibility that many people might not want to "return" to… Read More
Movie Of The Weak
2020-05-23 07:08
And they say no new movies will be produced for a while because of the plague. Sort-of known guy Antonio Sabato's got news for y'all.Here's the logline:  The Expendables + a cast of was… Read More
2020-05-22 20:30
We think we can go back. (Who, exactly, do I mean by we? What, exactly do I mean by go back?) Again, the animal instinct to "return" to "normal" and resist change overtakes the higher funct… Read More
2020-05-20 19:27
You guys, I think he might be trying to steal the election.[Piece of shit] Donald Trump mischaracterized Michigan’s absentee ballot policies on Wednesday while threatening federal fund… Read More
2020-05-20 18:37
[Trying something new -- pairing the usual current-events common-tarry with a short fiction piece. This will be serialized in six parts over the next week or so. As always, all comments, sug… Read More
2020-05-15 22:22
You know, if this babbling moron manages to win again, despite being THE STUPIDEST MOTHERFUCKER ON THE PLANET, this nation deserves every bit of what it's going to get, good and hard. I mean… Read More
2020-05-15 21:51
Not sure who is more deserving of the "simp of the week" award:the guy who thought there'd be a good story in plumbing the deep thoughts of a bunch of frothing bozos, only to find that they… Read More
2020-04-16 06:49
Good profile of Addison McConnell in the New Yorker. The main thing to keep in mind about Moscow Mitch is not that he's the closest thing this country has to a flat-out traitor, nor that he'… Read More

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