When you develop mindful awareness, you will notice your feelings as they arise within you and learn how to deal with Difficult Feelings.

Everyone has difficult feelings from time to time.

The first thing you need to recognise is that:

Your feelings are not good or bad. Your feelings are just what they are: emotions.
Click To Tweet

If you become aware of your emotions, then you can witness them without being carried away by them.  This is sometimes called “mind over matter.”

Feelings and Labels

Feelings sometimes get names added such as happy, confident, joyful, brave, good, or bad.

Your emotions can be easy to deal with, or they can be difficult depending on whether they make you feel comfortable or uncomfortable.

Children especially are always being told that they shouldn’t feel this way or that. Even as adults we are told to be positive, don’t feel hurt, don’t feel sad and don’t be scared.  However, these views are a judgement about our emotions.

Judgements try to impose upon us that negative feelings are bad.

At the opposite end of the spectrum, there is being happy.  We are encouraged to be happy, be brave, move on, get over it, or lighten up.  Again, these are simply judgements about our feelings and imply that the only feelings one should have are positive one.

Simply observe whatever you are feeling at the moment.
Click To Tweet

When you are mindful, you allow your feelings to simply “be”, with non-judgmental acceptance and curiosity.

Negative Thoughts and Feelings

We all know that negative thoughts can have a destructive effect on both our body and mind.  When we are stressed or anxious, the negative thoughts we have take us out of the present moment.

Negative thoughts can come from labelling and overgeneralisations.   Labelling yourself or your situation doesn’t make it any better.

Try taking away the labels you have given to your circumstances and observe the reality.  It can be freeing and open you up to the possibility of seeing your situation from a different perspective.

Taking away labels gives you the chance to see your situation from a different perspective.
Click To Tweet

Catastrophising is experienced when you struggle with anxiety, and imagine worst-case scenarios as results or outcomes. Overgeneralising can affect you if you have low self-esteem.  In this case, you mostly overlook the positive and focus instead on one sub-standard idea or piece of information.

The aim is to make yourself become aware of these thoughts, and that is where mindfulness comes into play.

By making yourself pay attention in a certain way, on purpose and in the present moment, it will allow you to become more aware of your thoughts without labelling or judging them.

Mindfulness allows us to be still and anchored in the here and now.
Click To Tweet

It increases our awareness and enables us to recognise our thought patterns.

When we are afforded the opportunity to notice our thoughts more clearly and become aware of the present, we can then begin to challenge them.

Difficult Feelings Meditation

1.  Sit comfortably and close your eyes.

2.  Focus on your breath, feeling your chest and abdomen expand as you breathe in and out.

3.  When you are ready, bring to mind a difficult situation or feeling.  Start with something small, perhaps an irritation, rather than a huge problem.

4.  Stay with this feeling and see what physical sensations appear in your body as you think of it.

5.  You may find uncomfortable sensations rise up within you, but that is ok.  There may be physical sensations of pain and that is ok too.  Bring your attention to the discomfort.

6.  If you are able to explore the discomfort.  Start gently and work into it.  If it feels too much then draw back a little bit.  Find the middle way, not standing back but not pushing too far.

7.  Try to embrace the discomfort and accept it as it is.  Breathe through it.

8.  Notice if the discomfort changes in any way.

9.  When you are ready, bring your attention back to your breathing for a couple of minutes.

10.  Finally, start gently wiggling your fingers and toes and open your eyes.

Often, when you are in a negative state of mind, you feel as if you are always in pain and that the pain will never go away, but remember:

Every feeling and experience passes.
Click To Tweet

Take the time to get mindfully in touch with your thoughts and emotions. You will be surprised at the difference it makes in your life and to the way your mind and body feel.

If you have any questions please ask!

The post A Healing Meditation for Difficult Feelings appeared first on Mindfulness Jar.