2016-03-19 18:53
A warning from the Freebeard – be terrified of the internet rage of teenage girls. The boys from semtex-land have got nothing on the ground-battering torrent of fury that flows when yo… Read More
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Fear Of A Bearded Planet Blog
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The non-sex life and non-existant loves of a ex-fundo muslim man who just wants some exposure to the decadent ways of the west. Tickle Ma Fuzz. Stroke Ma Beard ..go on...stroke it!
2016-03-19 18:53
The Freebeard is back and is wondering happened to the online Beardyverse?I step away for a few months (alright - years) and the place is over run by more face fuzz than waxing convention… Read More
2016-03-19 18:53
Arranged Marriage: Part 2 – The Mummy Inquisition After you’ve been to the Subjects’ house there is always the joy of the inquisition. If you’re lucky you ca… Read More
2016-03-19 18:53
All those wonderfully informed scholars on the news channels are convinced that all the motivation for seeking martyrdom is 72 eternal virgins.Now that seriously makes you wonder.I mean, fro… Read More
2010-01-11 21:53
There are times when one should be prepared. This motto was taught to the Beard-Grows-Free when he was a young stripling and was forced to sit through camp fire stories by the Akela while tr… Read More
2010-01-05 21:48
Welcome to 2010 my fellow bearded ones. It may not have escaped your notice that we have been blessed recently by the arrival of three snowflakes and a bit of cold air that has managed to cr… Read More
2009-09-07 16:13
Dear Jihadi-Video-Directors,A polite request on behalf of the Freebeard. I must admit I have never been a fan of your productions. You really have failed to grasp the history of film and esp… Read More
2008-12-26 13:30
As no one actually reads my badly typed scribblings, complete with terrible spelling and pointless, puncuation. I have realised that the best place for me is academia. That way I can spend h… Read More
2008-07-31 20:26
Dear Readers (yes I know that the only entities read this are the four and a half voices inside my bald head that resonate on the odd occasion.)I am very very sorry for the age that it has t… Read More
2006-12-25 12:38
Cultural difference is a wonderful things and the FB is not averse to celebrating it. In the spirit of adventure, exploration and because I wasn’t paying for the ticket I decided to cu… Read More
2006-10-06 13:04
There are sometimes where the Great One reminds you that all those musty traditions that seem to hang around and re-inforce themselves could be a heck of a lot better than the modern replace… Read More
2006-07-03 15:27
My muslim brothers, you have let yourself down. You have let the corrupt western superpowers and the dajaal drvie you to distraction and have forgone your own identity.Really, on the green b… Read More
2006-06-23 13:08
I'm getting abit tired of the whole refereeing nonsesne at the World Cup. Actually most football matches so here is a suggestion.We need to build a Ref central at Fifa headquaters. It should… Read More
2006-06-23 12:49
This survey was published in the Gaurdian. Apparently muslims are spending lots of time hating the west. Specially british muslims, really hating "The west.We are actually really jealous. No… Read More
2006-06-20 16:07
What happened to good old Britannia.It's all gone to the pure bred grey hounds I'm telling you guys.There was a time when Her Majesy's Constabulary of Plods could be relied on to deal with t… Read More
2006-06-20 15:44
I would like to appologize to you guys. If anyone is actually out there, yes even you viagra selling spam bot not that I would ever need such services. Liek the title says life intervened. I… Read More
2005-09-26 10:16
Huzzah tis the return of the FreeBeard, of course none of you actually noticed that due to DirectHex’s inept management of my word docs I have been missing from the internet for a whil… Read More
2005-08-13 18:09
There have been complaints at Freebeard central, located in the heartlands of Bradford, via Mogadishu ( and If that doesn’t get the boys from MI5 round here for a quick curry I don&rsq&hell…Read More
2005-07-15 23:34
When I don't need to say anything I leave it up to my better .. the LFM has it down.. click on this Read More
2005-06-26 09:40
Credit to the man ...at last a use for Celine Dion..."The Canadian superstar's bombastic cover of Eric Carmen's 1970s hit about loneliness is the audio equivalent of the fire-bombing of Dres… Read More
2005-06-25 13:39
So Science has given the FB a clue to why the otherwise inexplicable phenomenon of NGPB takes place. It’s one of the mysteries of human behavior that intrigues the FB , mainly because… Read More
2005-06-25 13:35
Ahhhhhhhh! No one can here you scream in your own bedroom. Specially when everyone is out.The Onion - veritably good sarco-news source - a trooper of many years against the po-faced inequiti… Read More
2005-06-16 19:32
Or musings on Arranged Marriages Part 1 : The Meet The Preparation As the Freebeard as been single for a while now, by now we mean since the dawn of the Jurassic period, the FB’s mum… Read More
2005-06-07 21:04
FB Discovers Himself It was the summer of 1998. The FB was attending a conference of the New Labour Youth Commando Units held in the tropical paradise and den of inequity that is Blackpool… Read More
2005-05-30 18:11
Ahh my fellow woolly ones, tis a fine day. The Sun is out, the birds are doing the chirping thing while dodging the traffic, the children are skipping joyfully from car to car keying them wi… Read More
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