Good Morning, Shanghai! It’s Hockey Night in China!

When: 4:30am PDT

Where: Shanghai, China at the 加拿大轮胎中心

Why: Because. Just because

Just when you thought the Gary had sated his expansionist appetites in Vegas, he moves the table - hell, knocks the table over, kicks us out of our own casino rink and throws our roster into the jet-lagged skies of market oppourtunity to pursue his dream of greedy global branding supremacy.

Kudos to the marketing boffins on the Avenue of the Americas. The timing could be perfect. It Worked for Buick. It worked for Apple. It worked for Nike. And now it could work for the NHL. Why not? Make American Pro Sports great again!

As a timbit of consideration for Canada’s game, the league forced permitted a Canadian team to attend the first NHL pre-season game in China! That and the Nucks are so far west that from NY they appear to be closer to Shanghai than Toronto. Rhetorical question period: If Bettman was the Chief Expansionist in 1970, would Vancouver still get a NHL franchise?

We did join the NHL and we won multiple Cups over the years (多年来，我们赢得了多次杯赛). NM, this is our chance to rewrite hockey history - in Asia. Seize the Day Latte!

After the beating and bruising we gave LA in LA last weekend - yes, an OT win is a beating - it’s how we won one of those Cups. But, I digress. Today is about playing a vital pre-season game against an old rival in a country obsessed with American icons trade balances. This is the first step to making the NHL the world’s most important sporting spectacle. The second step is Gary’s insistence, no matter the cost, on NHL players being part of the Winter Olympics. In 2022. In China.

The Canucks roster is being stretched across the globe - and we thought last year’s tussle with the Injury/Virus/Food Poisoning Faeries was extreme - this is like fielding two entire teams and coaching staff in one week!

Since I don’t know how you feel about our 2nd 1st team playing the great PR game 5,636 Red Miles away, there’s only one thing for it: Poll.

Enjoy this sporting battle of brand diplomacy. Twitter hasn’t been this excited since Nixon went to China to play national branding roulette.

As the NM Shanghai Division says: 去椰子！