You would be amazed by how much Conflict could be ended simply by the parties Listening to each other. Dealing with Conflict Through Listening In working as an analyst and as a clinical psychologist, I’ve learned that it’s best to listen, listen, listen, and then listen some more before responding. This course of action is especially wise whenever the person I am working with is upset. When it comes to conflict resolution strategies, at the top of the list is the art of listening. Listening does not mean remaining silent while being focused on what you want to say next rather than what the other person is saying. Listening means being fully present as you take in what a person says verbally and nonverbally. Don’t think about what you might say next, or try to anticipate what they will say or do. Don’t let your mind wander. Good listening also requires tuning in to the other person’s tone of voice, words, and body language. Their mood and hidden thoughts and feelings can be conveyed in subtle ways. Can you listen with all your senses? In martial arts, there are two important concepts, kime and ma. Ma is keeping the right distance, and kime is focus. I have applied ma and kime in my psychological and analytical practices, and in business dealings as well. By not being too quick to engage someone who appears to be angry or upset, you practice ma. Conflicts can arise quickly if you do not take the time to listen at the right distance and you engage too soon, while the person you are dealing with is emotionally overwrought. It is a challenge to keep your distance from another person’s anger and to listen intently without becoming emotionally involved yourself. Good listening involves ma and kime...

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