I'm feeling masochistic, which isnt entirely like me.
I want to thrown around, used, hurt, spanked (beaten) till I cry and cry hard.

I don't want to feel like me, I want to be taken away from my thoughts, my issues, my desire for a strong man's shoulder to cry on, lean on. One who cares for me, who would put his hand through my hair while I vented. I want to be taken away from my parents ominous marriage and impending divorce. Away from all of my friends engagements and upcoming weddings, away from the hurtful heartbreaks, away from the roommates with consistent bouncing checks and supporting lies.

I just want to come home and leave it all behind, rather than it all just digging deeper into me through dinner, laundry, errands, even while watching tv. It's all there; on my shoulders and screaming into my ears.

I can't fix much of it, I just want to forget it, if only for a little while. If it's only to focus on the the ice slipping into my cunt, or the cock thrusting into my mouth, and the belt repetitively cracking against my ass then that would be quite fine.