You hear a lot of folk saying that people are snappy, unkind, uncaring and worse nowaday. Do you think this is true?
I tottaly agree that we are all less likely than in years gone by to know our neighbours, also the sense of community has been lost in many areas and neighbourhoods. However, until you walk a mile in someone shoes you don't know what they are going through or what makes them so unfriendly or snappy.

Oftentimes, it is not directed personally at you. however much this may seem to be the case.
I will admit to be irritated myself the other day. I was queing for what seemed like an age in the post office (I don't do queing very well at the best of time.lol) but this day was particularily bad in there. There computers had gone off line, the person at the front of the que had 2,000 in pennies she wanted cashing up....well maybe not that much but...you know what I mean.
I was gritting my teeth when a very loud obnoxious lady flounced in, "Excuse me, excuse me" She shrieked as she was pushing passed all the patient folk in the cue. " Would you mind if I went before you?" She demanded from the man at the front of the que, ludly and rudely as she barged him. Well, all hell broke lose. He has had enough. He was parked on a meter that he was sure was about to run out, he had dashed out in his lunch brake to try to re-new a tax disc on his car that he had forgotten about, he was already irritated in the extreme when the said lady dememded his place in the que. How do I know all this? Well, he shouted all this out very loudly in response to her request. She looked at him, glazed expretion, said "huh" and turned around and walked out with her nose in the air. How rude everyone agreed. What a horrible woman!
We all continued to que, were eventually served after what seemed like an age and I left relived.
I was surprised to see the Loud demanding lady sitting outside on a wall crying. She sobbed in such a way it broke your heart.

Despite her apparent rudeness, I felt compelled to see if she was alright. She bawlled even louder at my asking. She blurted out that her younger sister had died in an accident, leaving her with three young children to care for, there was no one to help her arrange her sisters funeral and she was having difficulty coping with that, the kids, holding down her job, and on top of this her mother who she cared for was extremly ill too! She appologised for her tears and earlier rudness and berated herself as she had coped much better when her father had died ony three months earlier" Now you don't have to be psychic to guess how this porr lady was feeling.
I felt awful for her. Who can blame her for her stress and rudeness under these horrible preshered circumstances? She was trying to care for all those people, cope with her own greif,pay a gas bill that was a red reminder before they were cut off and rush back in time to take her sick mother to the doctors before picking the kids up from school!
Now I know this is perhaps exceptional and some would say there is no excuse for rudeness but...next time someone cuts you up in the car, instead of being angry or aggressive back, think about this...maybe they are rushing home to care for a sick child? Perhaps the doctor is off hand as he has had no sleep in 4 nights, perhaps that rude shop assistant is being abused by a cruel partner.

Wait a second, you say. I can't be letting everyone walk all over me because they have problems...so do I!!! (If you feel you are snapping at any and everyone, are stressed fir to bust, get some help. Anger management, counselling, phone a friend, whatever you need to do. Make the world a better place for your family, friends and yourself by doing so!)
Yes I agree, never accept rudeness or unkindness without challenging this behaviour however, bare in mind, the source of other peoples anger, bad mood or even snappy instances of rudeness may be something so difficult and so horrible that you thank god it's not you going through it!
Also...whatever the reason for, it is easier for you cope with this bad behaviour in other when you accept it is rarerly ever personally aimed at you directly.
What I do believe is that life is so much more stressful for many, support systems, family units and even close friends whom you can talk too have become as rare a commodity as unicorns in this day and age! Many people storm around like dangerous pressure cookers waiting to explode. If you are calm with them when they are like this, it helps you and them.
Incidently, I see the rude lady from the post office quite a lot in my neighbourhood now, she always has a smile and a nod for me these days....


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