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My marriage is ending, and I'm so upset because I thought we had the perfect relationship, and I don't know where to begin.



Don’t get too caught up in the image that you had the Perfect Marriage.  It’s an illusion – not necessarily a bad one, but an appearance nonetheless.  Right now, focus on getting out of your marriage.  Any thoughts that you are losing something “perfect” is going to make it that much harder on your situation.

Take stock in the positive aspects of your marriage – do you have wonderful kids, friends, a sense of security.  Look to what you do have, and mine those resources.

But, don’t dwell on the feeling that you are losing something that was perfect.  That is more of an outward appearance, a label that others may apply to you.  It’s part of an image.  Shed the labels and channel your energies into you.

What do you want?  Envision yourself as a separate entity – as you, not as a husband or a wife.  You are the substance, everything else is just an effect.  



This post first appeared on Backpacking Through Divorce, please read the originial post: here

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My marriage is ending, and I'm so upset because I thought we had the perfect relationship, and I don't know where to begin.

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