When it comes to Friendship, it is always better to spend time with people who really care about you. Finding good friends who you can rely upon can be quite difficult. Online social networking has enabled us to keep in touch with friends from all over the world but in my opinion, it isn’t a worthy substitute for a true friendship.

Facebook is a prime example. Cyberspace creates an illusion that we have lots of friends (really they are contacts), but if we’ve had a bad day at work or we have a problem we need to talk about, meeting up for a coffee with someone you can talk to, can make all the difference.

What constitutes a good friendship?:

Honesty and Openness:

Honesty is essential if you want a friendship to be based on trust and respect. This will also help to bring you closer together if you both know you can be honest with each other. I have found that people in general have a lot of acquaintances and maybe only one or two close friends.

Friendships (like anything else) take a lot of hard work and there will always be good days and bad days to deal with. Everybody has their ‘ups and downs’ so to speak and it is important your friendship is mutually supportive and strong enough to see both of you through when you need it most!

If you want a good friend, you need to be a good friend:

I have known a lot of people who manipulate their friends towards their own objectives and then, one day, they cannot work out why they have no real honest friends they can talk to. I once had a friend who had this problem. He worked full time and was always commenting on how he didn’t have any friends or a social life.

As I listened, I was beginning to understand why this person had no friends - he actually had no intention of being a friend to anyone! As he worked through this problem, he was becoming more aware that he only spoke to people who he thought could bring him closer to achieving the goals he had set himself.

Instead of speaking to people who he thought could advance his career prospects, he changed his ways and started cultivating real friendships. He soon felt he was being accepted and appreciated for being himself as a consequence of treating other people better. He hasn’t looked back since!

Don’t burden each other with problems:

There is nothing that will sour a relationship faster than bending your friends ear about your problems. Don’t do it! You will chase them away for good if you do. Your friend will not feel valued or appreciated if you only speak to them when you have a problem. That isn’t what a friendship is about. It is great to be able to talk to someone about a problem that is getting you down but it can go too far sometimes! A friendship should be mutually supportive but if you feel dread when your friend calls your mobile phone or if you cringe when you see their email in your inbox, it could be an indication that something isn’t quite right in your friendship!

Respect:

If you respect your friends needs, they will respect your needs in turn. In order to keep the balance right in your friendship, give and take is very important. If you begin to take advantage of your friend, the relationship will not last very long. This applies to every kind of relationship.

If your friendship is based on mutual respect, you will find that you can rely upon each other without taking unfair advantage. Respect for one another is the most important aspect of any relationship and if you treat others in the way you would expect to be treated yourself, you shouldn’t go wrong!