January second and the Purge has begun
No sweets, treats, sneaky cheats, no alcohol, no fun
No lounging in the afternoon, no dawdling this year
It’s detox, drills and diet pills in brand new running gear

I’ll carbo-cut, loose the gut and camp out in the gym
Hit the beach at dawn for an early morning swim
Drink protein shakes, eat fibre flakes with berries, nuts and seeds
There’s no low fat alternative that doesn’t meet my needs

February second and it didn’t go so well
A frosty Monday morning was the moment that i fell
And then there was that party with the chocolate cake and beer
A smorgasbord of luxuries, no way could I adhere

So I’m taking a hiatus just until my mood improves
I shall return in no time lifting everything that moves
Until then I’ll stay focused; I know where I need to be
And continue taking solace with the sweetener in my tea

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