Did I really need to buy 3 handbags at the weekend? Oh dear…
Tana has booked a stand at this year’s craft market but is already on non-speakers with organiser Beth, after the latter refused to give Tana a discount on the astronomical price of hiring the tent space for the weekend. This news was particularly galling since they even go to the same book club together! However, Beth has been unbending.
“Business is business and there are many others who will take the tent if you don’t. Kate from Safari Stuff and Geoff at Canvas Essentials have both been begging for space for months. As it is, they’ll probably have to be squeezed in next to the port-a-loos again and they are not going to be happy with that!” Beth says with authority, tapping her clipboard as Tana rolls her eyes.
Tana has put together an eclectic ‘luxe’ collection that includes wrought iron loo-roll holders decorated with welded on flowers, skirts made of local African kanga fabric, various bead necklaces slung over white washed wooden candle sticks. Most prices start at around the 10,000 Kenya shillings (£80) mark but she might bump everything up once she’s sent a spy into Sarah’s tent next door. Most of Sarah’s home furnishings are made by the exact same ‘side-of-the-road’ fundis (craftsman) that Tana uses. In fact she’s sure that Sarah has copied her candlestick design. The competition for custom is high and Tana has pinned her hopes on the fair financing a skiing holiday this year.
Once the fair is in full swing, Tana’s mobile rings and she’s summoned by security to the entrance gate. A stallholder complains that her handbag has been stolen but she’s interrupted by a shopper wearing a floral smock and Jesus sandals,
“This whole place is far too expensive, not worth the entrance fee and I hope that some of your profits are going to charity? It’s a disgrace.”
Beth blusters, firefighting the various crises.
“Well, were you hanging on to your bag or did you put it down?” Beth asks, a tad accusingly.
The aggrieved shopper leaves muttering something about calling the police.
At this moment, the security guards start chipping in that there are not enough of them to cover security at the grounds.
Back at Tana’s stall and it’s pretty hectic, mainly due to the high traffic of friends stopping by armed with cappuccinos and gin and tonics, who like to lounge on safari chairs inside the tent to gossip endlessly about the various shenanigans of local expat life.
“Did you hear that Flip and Pip have split? And old Woolly has lost his ranch?”
The worst offenders are vendors from ‘up-country’ who make a weekend of the craft fair, then slip away from their stalls to gossip for hours because they are so starved of news.
“How much is this?” asks a mealy faced customer about the price of a toilet roll holder. However Tana is too busy trying to catch the eye of glamorous TV presenter Siana to respond. Tana forgets to put price tags on anything as a strategic move not to put off potential shoppers by her high prices, but the constant interruption by customers asking how much things are is such a bore. Perhaps Tana should organise more help with her stall next year. Tana’s brother was enlisted to help last year but was absolutely hopeless. No idea of business at all. All he did was take off to get plastered with his friends, then insisted on collecting a commission. The cheek!
Scratchy and exhausted after being on her feet all day in a baking hot tent, Tana makes a point of seeking out Beth to tell her that the tent has been like an oven, customer numbers are markedly down and the venue is not nearly as good as last year’s. This news is not received well since Beth, still wielding her clipboard, is not in the most accommodating of moods. The two parking attendants have disappeared on a tea break and the road outside the venue is now backed up, just as the local police arrive to look into a certain handbag theft.
By the end of the weekend, Tana has sold most of the kitenge (African print) miniskirts that she has been modelling all weekend (after all, she does have good legs) but overall sales are not good and the skiing holiday will have to wait. At least the fair wasn’t a wash out like last year when torrential rains ruined half her stock. Tana cried over the destroyed leather and cowhide beanbags for days. Fortunately the weather over the weekend stayed relatively dry (apart from one faintly catastrophic downpour); however the atmosphere at book club will doubtless remain frosty.
Featured image: Crafts and Markets
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