I am.......
I wonder ...
[hmmm, pienso que ]
If love is a tale made for children --
A granting of sweet dreams in their innocence --
A honey-coating to help their throats
Choke down the bitter draught ...

yo oigo
[I hear ...]
A voice that whispers warnings, half-formed,
Bodiless as hope, until, I swear I cannot draw
Another breath unless this spectra be unmasked,
His lies mangled `neath my righteous tread;

I see ...
[Yo veo,]
Una mujer
[A woman,]
Una Puertoriqeña,[a puertorican woman]
proud, uncompromising,
Diaphanous as air
menos los llantos, las lagrimas [minus the screams and tears]
That fall in desolation about her [my] weary feet,
Salt poison pooled upon the withered ground ...

I want ...
[Yo quiero]
A measure of quietude, [un poco de silencio,]
The echo of alone which heals me of dreaming,
The nothing that stills the wanting,
The numb, the cold, that laughs at pain;
I am,
[Yo soy],
A woman [una mujer], una Puertoriqueña [a puertorican woman]
hidden ...

I pretend ...
[Yo pretendo],
That I can live forever y que con el tiempo [and that with time]
[which] Has no puissance but that which I afford Him
And so, puedo esperar, [and if i can wait],
I can be happy tomorrow,
Sleep is for the dead; but its ghosts haunt my waking ...

I feel ...
[Yo siento],
desmasiado
[Too much] -- too deeply to be directionless,
Too real for imagining, and yet the familiar eyes
aguantan nada..
[Hold nothing] of recognition -- only my reflection --
A meeting of shadows in sunlit glass;

I touch ...
[yo toco,]
The downy wings of hope, in wonder,
In reverence, in need, in hunger;
Alas, it burns my fingers as a flame,
A sacrilege, self-defined ...

I worry ...
[me preocupo,]
que no estoy sola
[That I am not alone]; that in my longing
I have forsaken all -- but oh, what reward,
que sonrisa divina,
[What smile divine ]should light the path to freedom --
And how can I but heed the siren`s call?

I cry ...
[yo lloro]
For having too much, for fear of bursting,
entonces,
[And then], when by the pouring of my soul
I lie, a vessel emptied,
I cry again
[Lloro otra vez.]
For what was had, and lost;
I am
A woman,
Soy una mujer, una purertoriqueña[a puertorican woman]
Basia,
empty ...

I understand
[yo intendiendo]
That life,
[Que la vida,]
is what you make it,
y que alguna veces
[and That sometimes], the coat of many colors
That marks your triumphs brightly, blends only
To loneliest of grey ...

I say
[Yo digo]
That we are made by life, shaped,
Broken, perhaps -- unmade and voided --
But always,
[Pero siempre],
the core of us remains, waiting
[esperando]
With only faith, with trust, to be reborn;

I dream
[yo sueño,]
Of bluest waters, reaching
With unnatural hands toward the faded sky,
Of dolphins that wander in seas without limits,
Carrying me water-breathing past corals and clouds ...

I try ...
[yo trato]
To lead by example,
knowing,
[sabiendo,]
That merely the telling of stories holds no power;
A gift of giving is merely a day, while
A gift of knowing spans forever;

I hope ...
[yo tengo esperansas]
That my darkness
[mi oscuridad,]
holds you gently,
That my pain is halved by sharing, that feeling
Wields nothing past the words it summons,
Except that it touch you with only healing ...

I am
[yo soy],
A woman,
[una mujer], una puertoriqueña [a puertorican woman]
solo, only.............Cinnamon
© 2007-2013, Cinnamon Irizarry. All rights reserved. No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author