In my last post, I went over some issues that might be giving you some problems in the bedroom. I’d like to continue on that subject for now as there are yet more reasons for “bad sex”. I’m actually not sure that I’ll ever get to them all but maybe these suggestions will help some of you and always feel free to contact me at Puss.N.Boots.Buzz(at)gmail. com.

One thing that a lot of couples fail to do is to look at sex as a sensual bonding experience. They tend to focus all on the prize and nothing more. The problem with this, as I’m sure some of you already know, is there’s usually a lack in connection. You’re both so focused on the climax that you miss the intimacy. I’m not saying that a good “quickie” doesn’t have its place in a relationship though. What I am saying is that all too often, couples tend to speed through sex too quickly on a regular basis. Sex, like a fine meal at an expensive restaurant, is something to be savored on occasion. Let it build with all of your senses! Taste, touch, smell, sight and sound are all very important!

What we like to do when we’ve noticed a decline in our connection, is to set a date! That way we can prepare to have the house to ourselves so there won’t be any interruptions. Then we’ll figure out the details and maybe even keep a few surprises to ourselves! We’ll generally start out by making dinner. I know this may not sound very erotic but when you have the house to yourself and you’re cooking a meal to enjoy together, lots of things can happen! A little sample of this while it cooks or a little sample of that as well as taking his hands in yours to show him the proper way to dice can be very intimate! It’s the closeness that counts!

As the meal is finishing up, we like to set the table with candles and wine. If you have kids like we do, wine becomes a less enjoyed beverage than it was before kids. The taste of it left on your lovers lips can be quite inviting too!

Once the meal is served, we like to feed each other a bite here and there. We also enjoy just talking about how we don’t do this enough or how sexy we look to each other. Without the communication, it’s really kind of null because that’s the whole point! To enjoy being with each other and talking about anything and everything! And don’t forget dessert! It gives you the opportunity to play with your partner a bit. Especially if you “accidentally” miss their mouth and need to lick off the mess!

We usually like to extend our alone time at this point by either just sitting outside to watch the sunset or taking an evening stroll. It not only gives us more time to flirt, which is very important too, but it also just gives us more time to reconnect with each other and talk. It’s the perfect opportunity to bring up any issues we’re having so we can talk through them to figure them out. Again, communication is essential!

On our way back home, we like to start flirting with each other and telling each other our plans once we return home. Maybe one of us has a surprise for the other and we’ll have to wait til we get home to see what it is! It just really helps with the build up to a wonderful sexual experience for us!

Once we are home we’re usually ready to turn up the heat and can barely keep our hands off each other! Rather than speeding through to the finale though, we like to go about it slow. Almost as if we don’t actually even plan on having sex. We just like to see how far we can take each other! This is a perfect time to introduce a surprise massage or even some edible body paint to be licked off later! Just literally push each other to the limit and see how much build you can get going! It’s so fun!

Once you’re actually in the bedroom naked, or maybe even not naked if you’ve worn some sexy lingerie just for this occasion, remember to still take it slow! Turn up that erotic factor to the max! Touch each others bodies from their head to their toes and leave nothing unexplored! Light some scented candles to help set the mood as well as provide an erotic glow. Pop your favorite cd into the cd player too! You’d be surprised how much these little things can help set the perfect mood!

Finally, build up to the ultimate finale! Caress and stroke your partner into oblivion! Then when you can literally take it no more and you’re finally having actual intercourse, make sure to look deep into your partners eyes and just breathe in their enjoyment. Don’t forget to show them yours as well! You’d really be surprised how much closer this will make you feel to each other! All of these steps will truly help you to have an extremely intimate evening with your partner. It can also help open the doors of communication and who knows? Maybe you’ll even learn a thing or two about how your partner likes to be touched.

I hope these steps will help show an example of how intimate an evening can be! Of course you can set your own storyline to what would suit you better. Cooking may be completely out for you and if so, maybe a picnic would be better? Anything that will just help you two to relax and connect on a personal level is all that matters! Just have fun and reconnect with each other. That’s really all that matters and after a long week of work, it will do wonders to help relax you as well!

I know I’ve stated this about a hundred times before but I can’t help mentioning it again. Communication is key! Everyone is so different and diverse on what they like and don’t like that there is no “one size fits all” category here. Just communicate with your partner and be receptive to their feelings and instructions. You’ll be surprised at what you might learn!

Again, there is no way that I’ve covered all of the problems that can lead to “Bad Sex” but I hope this post will help in some way or another. I’ll be posting more suggestions in future posts so don’t forget to come back and check those out too! So, until next time, have fun and go communicate with your partner tonight! See what’s on their minds!

Kisses!