Its now gone midnight, Monday 27th March 2017, and I thought because I can’t sleep I’ll tell you about the day that I had my Heart attack!
The date was Thursday 8th May 2014, I had been feeling ok (ish) during the day, my brother had come to pick something up, and as I was walking towards the door I started to get a pain in my arm, I just thought it was a slight angina attack, so I just tried to breath it away, which seemed to work. After tea I was stood in the kitchen washing up and it came back, but a bit more intense, so again I tried to breath it away, I told Baz that I wasn’t feeling very well and that I was going to go bed after finishing in the kitchen.
He asked me if I had taken my spray (I now had a nitrolingual spray for my angina), this was around 7pm, so I took it. I need to tell you at this point that I had been told by the Hospital that if I take it and the pain hasn’t gone within 10 mins I am allowed to take it again, if again the pain hasn’t gone then I have to ring for an ambulance!
I took my spray and it did nothing….but because of all the pain I was in I couldn’t remember if I was allowed to take it twice or 3 times, so I asked Baz to ring his mum, who also had the same kind of spray. She said that it was only 2 times. So I took it again, and again it did nothing…by this point I was writhing on the bed in so much pain.
Baz phoned 999 and told the operator what was wrong, they asked all kinds of questions, and said to stay on the phone with him until the ambulance arrived. They said that if I started to pass out or start to be sick to inform them of this, and as soon as they said that I started to feel nauseous.
The ambulance arrived and straight away attached an ECG to me, then they said that they wanted to get me into the ambulance to do further checks.
At this point I didn’t know that Baz had rung my daughter Stacey who lived in the next street, so I am in the ambulance and being asked all kinds of questions, but at no point did I get any kind of chest pain. The paramedic asked if I was still in pain to which I told him I was, so he gave me a tablet to put under my tongue, (which kind of works the same way that my spray does), and also gave me some morphine, well….let me tell you, that did the trick I was floated around that ambulance like a bird without a care in the world….but then I started to feel sick, and before I could tell the paramedic how I was feeling….yes you guessed it, I threw up all over him and the ambulance, he was covered in tomato pasta, I couldn’t help but laugh because I was so high on the morphine.
The next thing I know the doors open and stood there is my daughter and Baz, the paramedic told them that I would be taken to hospital and that Baz could follow us, but try not to keep up with them, I kind of gave them a look as if yo say “what do you mean”, the next thing I know we are leaving my flat with the sirens going full blast, “why do you need to put the sirens on?” I asked, “well”, said the paramedic, “its your heart and we can’t be too careful can we?”….I felt like I was on a rollercoaster the way the driver took some of those corners, but being high on the morphine it was quite fun!!!
We got to A & E, they wouldn’t let me walk into the department I had to be put on a wheelchair, once in there, a cannula was put in my hand and a blood test taken. Now, I need to point out here that the upcoming weekend Baz & I were meant to be going to see Billy Ocean in concert in New Brighton (where I now live), I mentioned this to the nurse who had taken my blood to which she replied, “oh don’t worry about that you will be ok to go”…..so that kind of put me at ease. She also explained that we would have to wait 4 hours for the blood tests to come back, and they would be putting me on a ward, like an assessment unit until the results came in. I told Baz to go home because at this point it was late at night and I couldn’t see the point in him staying with me, and promised to ring him as soon as I heard anything or saw a doctor.
I lay on this bed, listening to a drunk woman 2 beds down going on with herself for like 3 hours, just talking gibberish, wishing the doctor to come and tell me that it was just an angina attack and that I could get home to my own bed.
The doctor came to see me and said that they should have my results back in the next half an hour and he would be back soon…..anyway around 40 mins later I saw the same doctor walk back onto the unit and get on the phone and this is what I heard…..”yes, we have this 45 year old lady whose results have come back as this and that….ok so she isn’t allowed to go home?, ok I will sort out her being moved to a ward”…..My heart literally SUNK!!!!
He came to see me and said “Jackie the test results have come back and Im afraid that you won’t be allowed home as you have had a mild heart attack”…..WHAT??????
He then went on to explain what would happen, that a specialist would come to see me and to make a plan of what would have to happen next, “but I feel fine, Im in no pain whatsoever” I told him, “even though you think you feel ok, we have no idea what may happen if you go home” I asked if I was ok to go outside and phone Baz and if he was ok to come up and sit with me.
It was now 5am in the morning, I rang Baz and broke down on the phone, and just sat outside the hospital waiting for him to come and console me. He stayed with me until they put me on a ward, and luckily for me it was a ward where you could just come and go, so any given opportunity Baz would come up and we would go and have a coffee, or just sit outside and spend as much time together as possible.
A couple of days later, the specialist came to see me, and said that I would have to have another angiogram just to check what was going on, and that I would have to go to Wigan to have it done, I asked the name of the hospital, and when he said The Royal Albert Edward I instantly refused to go there, explaining that my brother & I had sued them over the death of our father. He said he would be the one performing the angiogram, I wasn’t bothered if it was him or the Pope there was no way that I was going to go there, so he agreed to send me to Wythenshawe, one of the best heart hospitals in the country.
This is how the conversation with the specialist went…..
“So we will get in touch with them and sort a date out, it will probably be in a couple of days or so”…….me “well, can I not go home and still keep the appointment?” the reason I asked this was because I felt fine and in a way I felt like a fraud taking up a hospital bed, when I felt absolutely fine….he said “Jackie, we can’t keep you here, and if you choose to go home, then you could be waiting even longer to get the angiogram done, and you could also be sat at home and have a massive heart attack that could potentially kill you”……..now when someone says that to you, and you’ve “only” had a mild heart attack it kind of puts things into prospective, so I said “OK, you win, I’ll stay, but please try and get an appointment as soon as possible”……he agreed that he would.
About an hour later a nurse came to see me and said that they had managed to get me an appointment for Monday….so I was going to be in hospital over the weekend and at least till Tuesday, but I just had to grin and bear it. Then I spotted a familiar face, a girl who worked at the same place that I did before I packed in to look after my husband who passed away, so at least I had someone who I could talk to, in fact they moved me out of my bed for her, and put me in a room on my own, which was quite nice, because if I couldn’t sleep at night I could just watch TV.
Monday came, and an ambulance came to pick me up, I had told Baz to go back to work, he had spent the last few days running here and there for me, and there wasn’t really anything else he could do, but his mum lived just around the corner from Wythenshawe hospital so we asked if it was ok for her to meet us there and stay with me just for company and support, which they agreed to.
I had the angiogram done and had a further 2 stents fitted, along with the usual lecture…..I was taken back to Bolton and placed on the Coronary Care Unit, when I asked why I had been put on there, (because again I felt like a fraud and that I didn’t need this bed), they said that because I had had the heart attack and the procedure done, they had to keep an extra eye on me, and there were less patients on that ward, and more staff so that they can keep watch over you.
1 funny thing did happen though during the night, as usual they came round and gave me my night timed medication which included a sleeping tablet, but as you know pillows in hospitals are wafer thin, so I was basically lay flat and I’m not used to sleeping like this, but because of the sleeper I was well away, then I heard someone moving around at the side of me, and it was my nurse, “Jackie,” she said “are you feeling ok?” …..”yea why do you ask?”….she said “well, you heart rate keeps dropping and we just wanted to make sure your ok”……..”my god woman….you’ve given me a sleeping tablet and I’m lay flat on my back, of course my heart rate is going to drop!!”……I couldn’t help but laugh, and she did see the funny side of it.
The specialist came to see me the next day, laying down the law, about smoking, not being able to drive for a week, not being able to have my grand children on my own, the chances in my medications etc etc….I was allowed to go home.
I phoned Baz who was at work and he told me it would be at least an hour before he could get to me, “dont worry” I said “I’ll get a taxi, I’m not staying here any longer than I really need to”…..my mum was there when I got home, so at least I wasn’t on my own.
I have to say that it was scary to think that I had a heart attack at the age of 45….but these things happen, and I don’t really help myself I know that. I know what caused it, and still to this day I haven’t managed to stop smoking. Like I have said in my previous blogs, I know what I have to do, and I have had all the nicotine replacement therapies that there is available. The only thing that I haven’t tried is hypnosis,,…..maybe that’s the next step.
Since my heart attack, I have had 2 more angiograms, the most recent one was just last week, and I’m glad to report that nothing was needed to be done, no more stents, and no (what they call) re-wiring. Although the specialist did say that there was narrowing in 2 more of my arteries, one of the right of my heart, and one at the back of my heart, and I WILL have to have these stented at a future date, when that will be is anyones guess.
I don’t want to die young, I want to grow old with my husband and see my grand children grow up….so please don’t judge me about the smoking, it has been a crutch in my life for so long, and to give it up is the hardest thing that I can do, its is an ADDICTION!!!! But someday I will do it!!!
In my next blog I want to talk about depression…my biggest demon, that could go on for a few days, and I will probably have to do it in stages, so if you are keeping tabs on my blog, then please bear with me with the next few blogs.
Much love people
Jackie xx
