I need help, you guys, all two of you. I. Can’t. Stop. Shopping. It’s bad. Really bad. I always loved shopping, fashion was always of grave importance to me. But for quite some time now I just haven’t felt the urge, kind of like the amazing way I quit smoking that all my cigarette-addled friends hated me for. One day, just like that, I didn’t need to anymore. I was so focused on moving, which meant saving, that no outfit could be worth it. Like, hello, we’re talking about the rest of my life here? Like I’m gonna delay that by buying that pair of Louboutins, even if they are on sale, hm – nope!

Where has my strength gone? IT’S GONE. Those Louboutins on sale? Have ’em in every color now! Okay, not literally, but just to drive my point home…I think what happened is work got reeeeeeally, reeeeeeally slow, like I’m on horse tranqulizers. Even though I do all of my freelance writing work at my day job (shhh!), I still finish and have a few hours left over with nada going on. So, I shop. I joined this thing called ShoeDazzle – they’re SHOE STYLISTS. They send me five pairs of shoes every month according to my tastes and I get to pick one, all for a flat fee I only pay if I pick one. They know me so well, my stylists. They are my best friends. My other best friend is Shop It To Me, a site that finds me all the clearance sales the internet has to offer on my favorite designers in my freakin’ size. How could you NOT having a shopping addiction with these sites? I used to hate shopping online, because if you truly enjoy shopping, doing it online takes all the magic – and exercise – out of it. But now, while I still love human real world shopping, I see the magic of internet shopping, too. Do you KNOW what it’s like to come home from work, a loooong, booooring day at work, and find a box on your table? And wonder, dear box, what could you contain? My creme colored biker jacket? My oxblood patent leather t-strap pumps? My assortment of textured tights? IT’S ALL TOO MUCH EXCITEMENT TO HANDLE.

Here’s the thing. Let’s be real, I’m not going to just stop shopping. Even with the one thing I have been dying for, moving out, getting closer and closer. But, I can go cheap. From this day forward, my friends, I will only be shopping at Forever 21, H&M, LuLus, ModCloth (ok, a wee bit more expensive but still), Loehmann’s, Century 21, and other discount or cheap stores. Purchases from paradises places like Bloomingdale’s will only be made under the circumstance of sale. Extreme sale. Stop the insanity.

I would like to end with my really good point, though. When you move, you’re meeting new people, and you have to make a good impression. I’m going to look killer. (well, my wardrobe will.)