Josh Harlow, 28

Stock boy

Invented a society where “we’re all just bros, man. Like everyone just helps each other.”

Jessica Milton, 21

College student

Founded eight new forms of anxiety, including a crippling fear of leaves.

Derek Chow, 17

High school student

Took advantage of an untapped market by introducing pot to the youth of Springfield Catholic.

Mia Thelman, 15

High school sophomore

Revolutionized how we eat (and think about) Entenmann’s powdered donuts.

Lauren Bradley, 24

Digital marketing coordinator

Co-wrote and produced two-woman rock opera inspired by Taylor Swift’s body of work.

Tina Cassidy, 29

Digital marketing manager

Co-wrote and produced two-woman rock opera inspired by Taylor Swift’s body of work.

Ashley Bonham, 25

Unemployed

Transcended space and time.

Mikah Bhatt, 18

College student

Co-founded a startup for an app that turns your dreams into Instagram stories.

Josh “Big Josh” Tenenbaum, 19

College student

Co-founded a startup for an app that turns your dreams into Instagram Stories.

Mike Schroeder, 18

College student

Co-founded a startup for an app that turns your dreams into Instagram Stories.

Jaden Coleman, 20

College student

Co-founded a startup for an app that turns your dreams into Instagram Stories.

Jared “ROO!” Roosky, 23

Production assistant

Wrote an epic poem on par with Gilgamesh, The Iliad, and “Bohemian Rhapsody.”

Lynn Schlegel, 27

Accounting assistant

Forever changed the way we think about bees.

Brad Rothman, 21

College student

Experienced a 400% increase in sexual pleasure.

Amanda Spader, 22

College student

Experienced a 4% increase in sexual pleasure.

Randall F. Bedford III, 23

Business executive

Invented a new feeling that just can’t be described.

Julia Smart, 28

Cashier

Saw the future.

Jeremy Rach, 22

College student

Made it to the end of a hallway that was, like, at least thirty miles long.

Alexandra Swinton, 24

Customer service representative

Founded a new color.

Jenny Reid, 29

Unemployed

Became the first to fully appreciate the comedic appeal of apples.

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