LAST UPDATED @ 6:02PM (3.7.2017)

Donald Trump will release evidence President Obama illegally wiretapped Trump Tower once it is found and can be safely extracted from his ass.

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, President Donald Trump declared he had lost the evidence of President Obama illegally wiretapping Trump Tower during the 2016 presidential election. Trump asserted he had lost the evidence that proved his accusation deep inside his derriere.

"I have the very real and shocking evidence of President Obama illegally wiretapping Trump Tower, but have temporarily lost it up my ass," Trump told a preselected group of news organizations that had recently said nice things about him.

Read More »