CHICAGO – Former vice president and current global warming superstar, Albert Arnold Gore Jr., was trapped in his limousine on Chicago’s Lake Shore Drive last night for thirty minutes after the limo slid into a twelve foot snowbank. Although Mr. Gore did not receive any physical injuries, his driver said that Mr. Gore may have had a nervous breakdown. A spokesperson for the Gore empire issued a statement this morning. “President Albert Gore, former U.S. Senator, Grammy and Academy Award winner and humbled recipient of the prestigious Nobel Peace Prize is resting comfortably at his home in the esteemed Malibu Beach community of beautiful sunny, southern California. He would like to express his heartfelt thanks to the dozens of devotees who’ve sent recycled cards wishing him a speedy recovery. Mr. Gore is well aware of the necessity of his presence in our deteriorating world, and he wants his disciples to know that after a few months of rest aboard his large yacht he will board his private jet and travel to far and distant lands to warn people they will soon suffer unimaginable agony and despair in the ever advancing apocalypse of global warming. The Gore estate will continue to […]