I have been on a hiatus from this blog. A lot has happened since I last wrote.

My Drug problem finally came to the forefront of my life and my family shipped me off to Rehab. After 30 days of inpatient rehab, I was allowed to return to school with several conditions. I am getting drug tested twice a week. My parents track my phone to make sure I’m going to my NA meetings, and my Mom stays with me in my apartment frequently. All of these conditions are very well deserved. The amount of lies I told and the money I spent in my active addiction are enough to ruin my family’s trust in me forever.

So here is what it’s like to be a college student in recovery.

It fucking sucks.

It is lonely. I am having to relearn how to socialize without the lubrication or crutch of drugs and alcohol. I am also isolated from my previous social circles because I am supposed to stay away from tempting environments. I used to have a relatively satisfying life. Then I went and Ruined quite a bit of it; I ruined relationships, trust, finances, you name it. Now I am highly dissatisfied with my life.

But I have been assured that it gets better. The longer I stay clean, the easier it will get and the better I will eventually start to feel.