Psst, I make money on some of the links in this post at no cost to you. It keeps the lights on around here. Amazon links are affiliate links. 

People love to ask kids what they want to be when they grow up. It’s cute and funny to hear them say, “A GARBAGE MAN!” with such conviction as they stand on their tip-toes with hands in the air.

There’s something really magical about this season of life where half of your thoughts are dreams for the future. As we age, we still Dream, but those dreams often become less about becoming an astronaut and more about paying off your house.

Today I reflected on all of the dreams I’ve tossed to the side over the last quarter century. It made me feel sad initially, but then I realized so many things have taken the place of these old dreams.

I think there’s a lot of value in looking at old hopes for the future and appreciating where you are in the present. After all, how can you learn if you don’t look to the past? The decisions we do and don’t make are what make us, after all.

Here are a few dreams I’ve given up–and what’s taken their place.

Dreams I’ve given up

Becoming a four-star general

When I was in fourth grade I was very, very serious about becoming a female four-star general in the military.

It was a bizarre and very specific goal, but that didn’t stop me.

My dad was in the Army and hinted that he wanted me to follow in his footsteps and advance through the ranks. As a fourth grader, this seemed like an incredibly easy thing to do. Hell, for Halloween one year I wore my dad’s old Army fatigues and dressed as a four-star general. If I dressed as a general, I was halfway there, right?

It didn’t take long for this dream to fizzle out. I was in sixth grade gym class and realized I had the upper body strength of a jellyfish. I was pretty sure the Army would put me on kitchen duty at best.

Forensic botany

This is probably one of the weirder things I’ve wanted to do.

Once my halfhearted desire to be in the Army fizzled out, I found the science of plants, or botany. I was in sixth grade and didn’t have a lot of friends, so that was a recipe for a bunch of weird shiz to happen.

I checked out books on plants at my library and devoured them. I even went so far as doing cross-pollination experiments with flowers in our garden. 11-year-old Mrs. Picky Pincher was super popular, as you can probably tell.

I loved studying plants so much that I wanted to do it for the rest of my life. I discovered that forensic botany was a very real field where you could help solve crimes with ~plant science~, which sounded like a dream come true.

The one hiccup? I was and am still horrible at math. What’s two plus five? Hold on, I actually need to count on my fingers.

No science laboratory was going to let my math-challenged self near a Bunsen burner or beaker, that’s for sure. I still enjoyed the scientific process and gardening, but I knew forensic botany wouldn’t be a good fit with my natural skills.

Professional acting

I fell into acting when I was in eighth grade. I was incredibly lonely and figured getting involved with school activities was a good way to make friends. I tried out for the school play and miraculously got a part. I was in a performance of a play called “Cinderella Incorporated” and I was a cat.

That’s all it took to hop on the crazy ferris wheel of acting. I went to a special performing arts high school for acting and everything. And hey, I was able to put my natural knack for not shutting up to great use, so it was fun.

I carried this dream of professional acting with me all the way to college. I remember sitting in the theater lobby with my friends, talking about life after college. In that moment, I realized nobody had career plans; they just liked doing theater and would figure out this whole “job” thing after they had a diploma and $100,000 of debt to their name.

That did not sound like a good plan.

I realized my friends were stupid, and I was following them right off the cliff.

I switched my major to the respectable field of Communications, which landed me a decent job after graduation. I still think about getting back into theater some day, but I’m grateful for all the lessons and experiences gained from it.

It’s easy to look back and feel bitter about things that didn’t work out. But you know what? Part of the journey is looking forward.

Dreams that are coming true

For all the dreams and aspirations I’ve given up, so, so many more have taken their place. I’ve received things that I didn’t even know to ask for, and it’s been such an amazing ride already.

Here are dreams that are coming to fruition!

Student loan payoff

IT’S HAPPENING.

I never thought we’d pay off our student loans. I really didn’t.

When Mr. Picky Pincher told me he wanted to pay off all debts before starting a family, I told him it was impossible. The words, “Dude, that’s impossible,” actually came out of my mouth.

Welp, I’m eating crow big time, and I’m thrilled.

Thanks to changing our lifestyle and making smart decisions, we’re on track to pay off our student loans by the end of 2018. We’ll have crushed these suckas in about two years. I always thought I would carry student debt to my grave, but it’ll be gone before I’m 30.

An amazing husband

Well, I just have to gush for a minute about my better half, don’t I?

Meeting Mr. Picky Pincher was a huge surprise. I had zero plans to stay in my college town or even to find a relationship. Life had other plans, and I came into contact with a very wonderful man, who I married in the spring of 2015.

When I met him I remember thinking, “Holy hell, there is someone in this world who has the exact same weirdness. What are the odds? Better make sure this one doesn’t get away.”

I pictured myself getting married later in life, but nope! That ring was on my finger at age 23. Oops.

Mr. Picky Pincher is an amazing and supportive human being. While some people would say young marriage is harmful, I think it’s been a great treat. We’ve navigated the stickiness of our 20s together and supported each other along the way. In a season of life where you often figure things out alone, we’ve had each other’s back.

I’m a stronger person both emotionally and financially because of my best friend/hubby.

Owning a home

Once the mistah and I were hitched, we wanted to buy a house and fast track our lives.

We hit a big snag once we crunched the numbers and realized that, at our current rate, we would NEVER buy a house. I remember crying and nearly throwing my computer out the window in frustration.

Our dream of home ownership was the reason we started this whole “get out of debt and retire early” journey in the first place.

It took us almost two years, but we did make our dreams of owning a home a reality. It’s been so powerful to see that smart money strategies actually work.

It’s not some giant scam after all! Hooray!

The bottom line

I could think all day about what could have been.

There are so many twists on the long, complicated road maps of our lives. I definitely couldn’t predict that I’d end up where I am now, but it’s even better than I imagined.

It’s important to reflect on whatever journey you’re on so you can see the beauty in how things have unfolded.

For me, this debt freedom journey has led to some of the most exciting opportunities. I’ve had a chance to REALLY get to know myself, and it’s been awesome.

We want to know: What dreams did you give up that have made you who you are?

The post Dreams I’ve given up–and what’s taken their place appeared first on Picky Pinchers.