Agh! Sooooooo much is happening in the world right now. Part of me feels compelled to blog about it all, just because I should, ya know? However, I have prided myself on being the kinda girl who doesn't do something just because it's expected. So I shall NOT blog about all of the ups and downs and craziness that is out there. At least, not today.
Instead I shall tell you how I've recently decided to start accepting applications for the position of girlie.
Now, for those of you who may not know, a girlie is (obviously) a girlfriend. Most females I know have them. For some reason, I fail and do not. Okay, that's kinda a lie. I do have a few girlies and they are wonderful. However, they're all either miles away or I've met them via the boyfriend and/or the band. And while that is not necessarily a bad thing, it can sometimes limit my girl time.
So I'm accepting applications. I've decided on this method because, well quite frankly, I've found that I suck at making new friends. And now you all know my deep dark secret. I am a shy, awkward and uncertain girl who just wants people to like her.
All together now, 3...2...1...GAG!
For those who are maybe interested in becoming friends with a neurotic such as myself, here is a list of position requirements.
+Applicant will be required to be available most evenings and weekends.
+Must like coffee and music. (This is non-negotiable.)
+Liking to read and/or write is a strong point in your favor, but not necessarily required. However, preference will be given to applicants with this quality.
+Must be able to detect sarcasm, use it in appropriate situations and be quick about it.
+Honesty is key.
+Cattiness will NOT be tolerated. And will be terms for IMMEDIATE dismissal.
+Also, it might be good if you were in a stable, secure relationship. That way there will be less temptation for you to try and snag the world's best boyfriend from me. (No, I am NOT the jealous type. Just stating the obvious.) Plus, that leaves the option on the table for double-dates and game nights as couples.
+However, having to ALWAYS have your significant with you will be an automatic disqualification.
Compensation to be determined based on how well you fit the position's requirements and will payed in the form of my attention and companionship. And also, possibly, in baked goodies. Interested applicants should leave their job pitch in the comments section below.
Whatcha think gang?
I'm off to fold laundry while I anxiously (and very impatiently) await my replies. Toodles!
** A disclaimer. I used the pic today because it cracked me up. I am very much straight and still madly in love with the boyfriend and in no way, shape or form am I looking for a lesbian lover. Not that I have anything against lesbians...just not for me, ya know?
