It is difficult to keep our gaze where it should be during any trial or tribulation, but to pull our attention away from our Creator and focus it squarely on ourselves is spiritual (and relational) suicide. How do we change, though? How do we keep our focus right when we are in such a personally tragic situation? It is not easy. I won’t pretend that it is, but it is necessary. There are a few things I learned through my own struggle with this issue:

1. Being consumed with infertility or miscarriage isn’t going to change it.

The Bible asks an important question in Luke 12:25- Can all your worrying and obsessing add even a single moment to your life? No, but studies have shown that it can take them away. Worry is futile. It is useless. Constantly obsessing over your situation has no effect on the situation itself, but it does have destructive effects on you. It changes you into someone you never intended to become, stripping you of joy, peace, and contentment. Worry is sin, and it is an expression of selfishness. It is a declaration of your mistrust of everyone but yourself. More importantly, it is the assertion that God is a failure and a liar.

You probably read that last sentence and thought “I would never say that”, but if you have allowed yourself to become consumed with circumstances beyond your physical control, then you already have said it. I could go more in depth, but this is an area you need to search out for yourself.

2. God is the only one who can change your circumstance.

He is capable of anything. We are so quick to put our confidence in those with limited control (i.e. doctors) but reluctant to turn it over to the One who controls the universe itself. I am not preaching against seeing doctors, I am simply reminding you of Who gave the doctors their wisdom in the first place. He is the source of all knowledge and power. He alone has the words of life, to whom else could we go? Is anything too hard for the Lord? (Genesis 18:14)