Fear is all I know these days, Fear and worry.I cried for about 30 minutes in the shower I just don’t understand why I was dealt this hand in life. I had no parents growing up but now my adult life is full of worry, anxiety, sadness. I don’t know how much more I can take. I try to smile at work and everywhere else. I pretend I’m OK but inside I feel so broken each day. I am no longer happy to wake up because waking up just means another tough day to get through. I don’t understand God’s plan. When will this be over? Every thought that crosses my mind is a burden of worry. Every symptom I immediately think of something horrible. The worst is thinking if I have something and then pass it to my son or husband. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. I barely could now. Please Jesus, help me. Help me put all my faith in you. Help me to know I have no control you do. My heart is heavy for filling this each day. I can’t even talk to anyone but you. I feel the more I talk to others the more they disregard me or say to not think about it or it will be OK. If only it was that easy, I have never felt this pain in my life. I can’t focus on anything except my worries. I know you created me and only you can help me. Please help me find the strength, only you give me. Please stay with me, because I don’t think I can fight this battle alone. Am I such a horrible person is that why this is happening? Why, why, why? I know I will lose everything because I can’t control this anxiety and it’s going to ruin my life. How can I be a good mom or a good wife if I can’t focus on them? I can’t lose the only two people in my life that I love dearly. Jesus, please… Take this all away! Take me back to when I was full of joy with my family. I just need some kind of sign it will get better. Please God!