Education. The fundamental learning that we go through in life. Not only in classrooms but with every aspect of what we learn from our day to day experiences to meeting people. Learning from mistakes, from other stories that we hear. Education can be found in all these ways. Still I think today we place so much emphasize only on education in the classroom. I fundamentally realized this when I took a break from working. I was always busy and it made me combine my time and prioritize things. Always know that what you fundamentally learn is the most important thing and basis for what you become and who you choose to be.
It becomes about what school you attended, what university you did your degree from. Did you achieve the highest grades, were you an A player in school. The list is endless. I am guilty of this as well. When I was in college I wanted ot join the best schools in the city and I did. Everyone would say, its great to join the top schools and I achieved a lot of awards and recognition. But I always felt incomplete. I felt that I should have got more marks in math or in economics. I should have studied harder. Nothing was good enough. I got good grades. Everyone was happy with me and I went through bad grades too. Its when I got good grades that I actually started putting more pressure on myself.
It becomes about what school you attended, what university you did your degree from. Did you achieve the highest grades, were you an A player in school. The list is endless. I am guilty of this as well. When I was in college I wanted ot join the best schools in the city and I did. Everyone would say, its great to join the top schools and I achieved a lot of awards and recognition. But I always felt incomplete. I felt that I should have got more marks in math or in economics. I should have studied harder. Nothing was good enough. I got good grades. Everyone was happy with me and I went through bad grades too. Its when I got good grades that I actually started putting more pressure on myself.
That is why I say education is not just in the classroom. It not about the Harvards or the IIM’s of India and its definitely not the grades. Education is PART of your learning which comes with classroom. It what you do with your education that really makes you a true success story when you get into the real world to work and build a career. Spirituality taught me more about education than anything else will. These are some of the lessons that I learnt early and hopefully will help you in some way that it helped me grow.
1) STOP JUDGING
Biggest mistake I have done is value people more because they studied in the ‘better’ colleges or got ‘better’ grades or where more ‘accomplished’ because of those things. Would it still matter if you were the most successful person you knew, and at the sametime the most crappiest? Nope. I learnt that I respected someone who no education but was kinder, nicer and was better to know. Most success stories if you see today are not people from reputed colleges but who don’t even have degrees. They had something more, the understanding of prioritizing and hard work and focus on the right things. They had the skills already in them that they didn’t need a degree to feel more accomplished.
2) QUALIFIED ARROGANCE
Don’t get me wrong. I respect anyone whos studied and done well and I fundamentally believe that it is very important to study. It gives you the tools and learnings. But all my point is that if you have all the education in the world and are the most annoying/arrogant or rude person to know. That really is a waste of a person. That wont get you far, it probably will take you Ahead because of your knowledge but not to the greatest heights of success and joy because of who you become.
3) TRUE LEADERS ARE LIKEABLE
One of my biggest learnings about success. The higher your grow or the promotions or you start a company and you become the CEO that al is great. But the most impressive and amazing leaders that I met or worked with are likeable. It is something what people look for. A manager might not have a lotta experience but if you are likable you have a more edge over the person who have many more number of years of experience. Be likeable. Genuinely care about people. Go a little out of your way to see if you can assist someone. Doesn’t mean you need to brag or like them or do things you don’t want to do. But do a little extra and it will be something people like about you. Leaders who think about others are the real leaders. The ones who want to get ahead on expense of someone else are just disliked and people start observing and it goes against them.
4) SELF-REFLECT
So you got your education you are really good at what you do. But training is fundamentally very critical. It is like polishing your silverware. I know bad analogy. But I mean its actually quite refreshing to attend trainings to see what you can learn that can help your process and develop what you are and who you are. Its very important to apply your learnings and attend to get more creative. It has taught me to be open to development and how to improve your process. Its my favorite field in the world to learn and to grow and teach and evaluate yourself. A true leader has the ability to self reflect. That is what training is all about.
5) GUIDANCE
Often times the most hard and fast rule is to give feedback. The most important thing though is how you give it. Respect and genuinely caring about the person helps you give better feedback. Now, I mentioned this in my earlier points but I am repeating this as I think the struggle we have today is so much focus on meeting the numbers, we forget people. You forget people and that’s when the cracks start. You cant find people. People are the reason you get things done. They are the people who will help you. So don’t worry about always trying to be right. Guidance is what people need, not feedback. Don’t get hung up on trying to fix everything. Be the mentor be the coach be someone that people look forward to giving them guidance not just forcing it.
6) GET AHEAD - THE RIGHT WAY
Now you might wonder. Well there are people who get ahead without doing any of these things. I agree. I have seen it. They back stab, they play games, they steal ideas, they think they will get ahead coz they are ‘smarter’ as a result of doing all these things. Some of them do get ahead. But people catch on. People know when someone goes behind them and does things. Eventually. For those who play the game and no one comes to know, great for them. Great manipulators. It’s a choice actually. If you want to be a follower and do the wrong things, its fine. The sad part is most of them don’t think they are doing anything wrong. So that is the real problem. The reason is simple.
Its harder to do the right things. You need to wait, you need to work hard, you need to win people over, you need to be able to get more information. These are the right things to do. But they are the longer route, they take more time. The wrong ways take less time, someone elses ideas, someone elses ways, someone elses promotion etc…its shorter and easier. So its your choice. Your conscious will be happier if you achieve them on your own. When I bought my first car with my salary and my own loan without taking anything from my parents, that feeling was so amazing. I felt like I had conquered the world. Could my dad have just bought me a car? Sure. I wouldn’t feel the same exhilaration that I did when I bought it on my own. That is what I am talking about. Be self made. But that is the tougher path. And its your choice.
Its harder to do the right things. You need to wait, you need to work hard, you need to win people over, you need to be able to get more information. These are the right things to do. But they are the longer route, they take more time. The wrong ways take less time, someone elses ideas, someone elses ways, someone elses promotion etc…its shorter and easier. So its your choice. Your conscious will be happier if you achieve them on your own. When I bought my first car with my salary and my own loan without taking anything from my parents, that feeling was so amazing. I felt like I had conquered the world. Could my dad have just bought me a car? Sure. I wouldn’t feel the same exhilaration that I did when I bought it on my own. That is what I am talking about. Be self made. But that is the tougher path. And its your choice.
CONCLUSION
I just wanted to share few pointers to kinda give you guys a feeler f what you might be going through at work or even your personal life where people love to criticize, or tell you what to do. Those are not bad things, only if its suffocating or something your not looking for so just be aware that you don’t need to always put up with people or listen to people and believe what you feel is the most important for you. Guidance is good, even important. Not if someone forcing it to you.
The biggest lessons I have learnt is to stop wondering and worrying about people. I have lesser people today in my life and more happiness as a result of it. We met some friends in Sweden and one of them said something that really stuck with me. They said they have a lot of people they know, but very few friends. Too many friends is not a good thing. I finally understand that. I always had people in my life and learnt from them and I am ever grateful..but with time, you start maturing and you want to be surrounded by people that matter. I did just that. Filtered out a lot, and find myself better off. More focused, less waste of energy, less talking, less botheration and more determined. So my advice would be just that.
Don’t listen to anything I have written unless you believe in it. Lol!!
