I always wanted to be a cool girl in a Leather Jacket. My fellow 1990’s goth/ punks all had them. Black. With spikes and grommets and buckles. Maybe the cover art from a Black Flag or New Order album drawn lovingly on the back.
But I couldn’t pull it off. I was too…. girly. More a Bronte goth than a Fuck Shit Up goth.
I still wanted that fucking jacket though. As I got older I purchased brown, black, green, vintage, peplum, ostrich, etc etc. I would buy them with hope in my heart and then, when I tried to actually wear it, would feel crushing defeat because I always looked absolutely ridiculous. Do it would be returned or sold or hidden away in the shame corner of the closet.
One day while trolling Nordstrom, I found it. Lilac suede. Little puffed sleeves. Slim fit. Perfect. And as unapologetically girly as me.
