It was time to start a new cycle of films for me, but I was given a chance to watch another screener. My friend Terry thought of me when he heard a director that he knows was looking for people to get some reviews out for his newest film, Post Apocalyptic Commando Shark (2018). Terry told writer/director Sam Qualiana and he got in touch with me right away. I have watched and reviewed a couple of Sam's other films, so why not this one as well, right? Besides, I'm always happy to spread the word about a new low budget film, so let's see what I thought of this one!
Set sometime in the future, the world is at war. The Soviet Union is under new leadership and has set its sights on the USA. Nuclear weapons have been exchanged but that wasn't enough to get the USA to surrender. With the help of a German scientist, the Soviet's have invaded the USA and they are now fighting groups of citizens who have banded together to defend their homes. Siegfried (Sam Qualiana) has found a way to combine shark and human DNA to make the perfect killing machine. After the half shark/half man will shoot you, it will then eat you. After a series of losses that takes out most of the leaders in New York, it is now up to the new guy, Marty (Simeon Qualiana), to save the day.
If I remember right, Terry posted a trailer for Post Apocalyptic Commando Shark a little ways back. To be honest, I wasn't sure what to make of it. I was willing to give it a chance if I was able to watch it someday, but it didn't feel like the kind of movie I would be into. When I was offered a chance to watch it for a review, there was no way I was going to turn it down. Post Apocalyptic Commando Shark isn't much of a horror film, which is why I didn't think the film would be for me based on the trailer, but Qualiana makes up for that by making his film funny. This is part comedy, part satire, a small part horror, and pure batshit crazy. Things may be set sometime in the future but Qualiana uses a lot of things that are going on today in his film. "Make America Great Again" runs through his film a lot, even having his President throwing out something our current President has said. Many of the characters have flags as part of their uniform, either in patches or just wrapped or draped around them. Russian hackers are brought up at one point as well. I was surprised by all of this but impressed by it at the same time. After I finished watching this movie, I emailed Sam in order to let him know that I was finished. He had to change the settings in order to let me watch it, so I wanted to let him know so he could change the settings back. He hoped that his movie made me laugh and it did. A lot really. There was one section of the film that got me laughing pretty good and has a line in it that I want to steal to use on others. This had to do with who is listening to a radio. The talking dog was also very funny with some of its lines. For me at least, the comedy worked best when Marty and Alfonzo, played by Andrew Elias, were having arguments. Things get even better when the mega shark...
"Gargantuan Shark!"
Right. Sorry. Things get even better when the gargantuan shark appears. Big ass sharks, half shark/ half human, and talking dogs may all sound silly but I don't want to call Post Apocalyptic Commando Shark a silly film. Sure, it is more of a comedy than a horror film and it straddles the line between comedy and outright silly towards the end of the film, but I never felt it actually crossed that line. I do wish it had been more of a horror story, even if there are walking and talking half sharks around. I did feel that the story jumped around a bit too much at times, but it wasn't all that hard to follow all the same. Sometimes the voices could bug me because they could be hard to hear, like the narrator. The version I watched had subtitles at the ready so I wasn't too annoyed by not being able to hear a voice all that well.
There are hardly any effects to be found which surprised me some. We see the sharks chomp on people in a way, but what little blood we get to see was CGI. If it wasn't, it sure reminded me of CGI blood. We also get some body parts here and there that is easy to see that they are fake, but that just added to the movie instead of taking away from it. I mean, it is a comedy. The goriest that things get is when one character has his guts hanging out, but even that you could tell it was just on him, not hanging out. The acting was alright. I really liked Andrew Elias just because his character happened to remind me a lot of the conspiracy believers that I sometimes talk to. Mick O'Keefe, who seems to be something of a regular for films in the Buffalo area, has a small role. Debbie Rochon also has a small role but it was still cool to get to see her in this movie. Sam Qualiana stole the show whenever his character showed up.
Post Apocalyptic Commando Shark may not have been my kind of film but I still had a lot of fun watching it. As I have said before if a movie makes me laugh then I'm good with it. To be fair, this movie doesn't have a horror tag, so I shouldn't complain about it not being a horror movie. Even though it doesn't have the tag, at least on IMDb, but you can see the influence all the same. Anyway, I wanted to thank Sam one more time for allowing me to watch his movie. I was an honor and a pleasure. This movie is out there if you are interested in watching it. You can rent it or buy it, from what I can see on Amazon at least. This movie won't be for everyone, of course, but if you don't mind the low budget feel and it sounds like something you will enjoy, please give it a look.
3 out of 5 At least my degree didn't come from KGBU
Set sometime in the future, the world is at war. The Soviet Union is under new leadership and has set its sights on the USA. Nuclear weapons have been exchanged but that wasn't enough to get the USA to surrender. With the help of a German scientist, the Soviet's have invaded the USA and they are now fighting groups of citizens who have banded together to defend their homes. Siegfried (Sam Qualiana) has found a way to combine shark and human DNA to make the perfect killing machine. After the half shark/half man will shoot you, it will then eat you. After a series of losses that takes out most of the leaders in New York, it is now up to the new guy, Marty (Simeon Qualiana), to save the day.
If I remember right, Terry posted a trailer for Post Apocalyptic Commando Shark a little ways back. To be honest, I wasn't sure what to make of it. I was willing to give it a chance if I was able to watch it someday, but it didn't feel like the kind of movie I would be into. When I was offered a chance to watch it for a review, there was no way I was going to turn it down. Post Apocalyptic Commando Shark isn't much of a horror film, which is why I didn't think the film would be for me based on the trailer, but Qualiana makes up for that by making his film funny. This is part comedy, part satire, a small part horror, and pure batshit crazy. Things may be set sometime in the future but Qualiana uses a lot of things that are going on today in his film. "Make America Great Again" runs through his film a lot, even having his President throwing out something our current President has said. Many of the characters have flags as part of their uniform, either in patches or just wrapped or draped around them. Russian hackers are brought up at one point as well. I was surprised by all of this but impressed by it at the same time. After I finished watching this movie, I emailed Sam in order to let him know that I was finished. He had to change the settings in order to let me watch it, so I wanted to let him know so he could change the settings back. He hoped that his movie made me laugh and it did. A lot really. There was one section of the film that got me laughing pretty good and has a line in it that I want to steal to use on others. This had to do with who is listening to a radio. The talking dog was also very funny with some of its lines. For me at least, the comedy worked best when Marty and Alfonzo, played by Andrew Elias, were having arguments. Things get even better when the mega shark...
"Gargantuan Shark!"
Right. Sorry. Things get even better when the gargantuan shark appears. Big ass sharks, half shark/ half human, and talking dogs may all sound silly but I don't want to call Post Apocalyptic Commando Shark a silly film. Sure, it is more of a comedy than a horror film and it straddles the line between comedy and outright silly towards the end of the film, but I never felt it actually crossed that line. I do wish it had been more of a horror story, even if there are walking and talking half sharks around. I did feel that the story jumped around a bit too much at times, but it wasn't all that hard to follow all the same. Sometimes the voices could bug me because they could be hard to hear, like the narrator. The version I watched had subtitles at the ready so I wasn't too annoyed by not being able to hear a voice all that well.
There are hardly any effects to be found which surprised me some. We see the sharks chomp on people in a way, but what little blood we get to see was CGI. If it wasn't, it sure reminded me of CGI blood. We also get some body parts here and there that is easy to see that they are fake, but that just added to the movie instead of taking away from it. I mean, it is a comedy. The goriest that things get is when one character has his guts hanging out, but even that you could tell it was just on him, not hanging out. The acting was alright. I really liked Andrew Elias just because his character happened to remind me a lot of the conspiracy believers that I sometimes talk to. Mick O'Keefe, who seems to be something of a regular for films in the Buffalo area, has a small role. Debbie Rochon also has a small role but it was still cool to get to see her in this movie. Sam Qualiana stole the show whenever his character showed up.
Post Apocalyptic Commando Shark may not have been my kind of film but I still had a lot of fun watching it. As I have said before if a movie makes me laugh then I'm good with it. To be fair, this movie doesn't have a horror tag, so I shouldn't complain about it not being a horror movie. Even though it doesn't have the tag, at least on IMDb, but you can see the influence all the same. Anyway, I wanted to thank Sam one more time for allowing me to watch his movie. I was an honor and a pleasure. This movie is out there if you are interested in watching it. You can rent it or buy it, from what I can see on Amazon at least. This movie won't be for everyone, of course, but if you don't mind the low budget feel and it sounds like something you will enjoy, please give it a look.
3 out of 5 At least my degree didn't come from KGBU
