The first season of Big Brother: Quitters Edition has been as rushed and abridged as perhaps we can expect when dealing with people who think they are celebrities. There are still five people left heading into the final night, as we conclude with the same expedited nature of the show that we have seen all season. Omarosa, Ariadna, Ross, Marissa, and Mark are the final five. With all the dumb luck twists and hurrying through the season, it’s hard to really point to which of them has played the best game, though it hasn’t gone so fast that I can say any of them has grown on me to the point where I’m actually rooting for them.

The HOH competition requires them to be the last person standing on their skis. Marissa is predictably the first to fall. Ariadna is next. Ross puts a deal on the table, which seems silly at this point in the game. Night one maybe, but we’re way too far in by now. Except it actually works, no matter how much Omarosa sticks her nose into it. Ross wins HOH.

Nominations
Ariadna
Omarosa

The veto competition requires them to match days with events that happened in the house. They must try to get the fastest time possible, but also must get as many correct answers as possible. Mark (6 correct), Ariadna (4 correct), and Omarosa (1 correct) are eliminated based on the other two having a perfect score of 8 correct. Marissa finishes in 12:31. Ross wins the power of veto with a time of 5:42.

Veto Ceremony
Veto is not used.

Votes
Marissa: Omarosa
Mark: Omarosa

By a vote of 2-0, Omarosa has been evicted from the Big Brother house. Good riddance. Please stop showing up on my TV screen. She had the chance to stop this alliance, but she kept them intact both times she was HOH.

The final HOH competition normally takes place in three parts, but we don’t have time for that here. Instead, it is a single multiple guess question challenge.

Marissa is the only one to get the first question correct. Everybody gets the second, third, fourth, and fifth questions correct. Ross and Mark get the final question correct, bringing us to a three way tiebreaker. Everybody goes over, so Marissa wins HOH with the closest answer.

Marissa must now eliminate not one but two people and determine the other person sitting next to her in the finals. She chooses to evict Mark and Ariadna so that her ally Ross can come with her. Perhaps not the smartest decision but a loyal one.

Now the first jury since season 3 to know exactly what happened during the entire season returns to vote. There’s a reason for sequester (Danielle should have won that season), although it is broken because everybody is sequestered together and can spend weeks trying to influence the result.

Votes
Mark: Ross
Ariadna: Marissa
Omarosa: Marissa
James: Marissa
Brandi: Ross
Metta: Ross
Shannon: Marissa
Keshia: Marissa
Chuck: Marissa

The Celebrity Big Brother winner is Marissa Jaret Winokur.

As far as America’s favorite, the top three vote getters are Shannon, James, and Ross. I was expecting Shannon and James, but the actual winner is Ross.