1. "Mutual, I'm sure."
2. "There are few people who know the secret of making a heaven here on earth. You are one of those rare people."
3. "Why didn't you tell me I was in love with you?"
4. "And Mrs. Claus has positively identified the kidnappers as Martians."
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5. "She was sort of a medium built, medium height. With a nice evening gown on with a belt in the back. She's sorta built like the girl I knew from the corner drugstore who used to play pinball. Conshwella Schlepkiss. I remember she was high man three weeks in a row."
6. "You know my name, but who are you? Just another American who saw too many movies as a child? Another orphan of a bankrupt culture who thinks he's John Wayne? Rambo? Marshal Dillon?"
7. "Everything is hunky-dunky!"
8. "George, I am an old man, and most people hate me. But I don't like them either so that makes it all even."
9. "Oh, Christmas isn't just a day, it's a frame of mind... and that's what's been changing. That's why I'm glad I'm here, maybe I can do something about it."
10. "William, Barney is dead. I shot him. I killed him. I shot him with this." (This might be a difficult one to answer!)
11. "Some men are Baptists, others Catholics; my father was an Oldsmobile man."
12. "Well, what do you want me to do about it? If he's dying, he's dying."
13. "That's not the friggin' Christmas Star, Gris... Its the light at the sewerage treatment plant."
14. "I have known misfortune. Poverty. Humiliation. I've even known the shame of having to beg. But I have never received such an insult as you have just delivered. I have no price, young man--unless the value a man places upon his honor may be called be a price."
15. "I've positively decided we're going to get married at the earliest opportunity and I don't want to hear any arguments. That's final. I love you. Merry Christmas."
