Funny Caption #61
| A collaboration between KFC and Crocs (available in Spring 2020) |
"This is what you get when you cross a chicken with Crocs."
"I'm too chicken to wear these shoes!"
"Some food for foot."
"Finally there's somebody you can ask 'why the chicken cross the road'..."
"Would you like some fries with your shoes, m'am?"
"Just what the podiatrist ordered."
"If you accidentally drop some sauces onto these shoes, they become more tasteful."
"Do my feet look fat in these? Or wearing them make my feet fat?"
"A convenient marriage of fast food and low fashion."
Funny Caption #62
| Victorian photograph that documents ladies' hairstyles |
"Just taking a smoking break from the pandemic."
"He's smoking in a Beijing's smog-free zone."
"Excuse me sir...where can I buy these smoker friendly mask?"
"Does this mask come in a smooth menthol flavour too?"
"Is that a legal loophole?"
"Warning: smoking cigarette or drinking disinfectant won't kill Coronavirus. Just you."
Funny Caption #64
| a praying mantis catches a lizard |
"How does that grab ya?"
"Praying mantis? No, preying mantis!"
"Bite off more than you can chew?"
"Praying? Man 'tis a meal!"
"It's gonna go straight to my thigh. Heck, it's not everyday I'm having lizard for dinner!"
"Look closely, Jackie Chan! I only show you once!"
"This meat is good enough to die or kill for..."
"Listen to the sound of my voice...your eyelids are getting heavier and heavier..."
| Taken 1939 |
"Show me what you've got, Tommy!"
"Ok, I'll take four of these for starter."
"Military umbrella provides a strategic cover."
"Duck season? Rabbit season?"
"Cloudy with a chance of lead and mist."
| Plex'Eat bubble prototype designed for physical separation in restaurants by French designer Christophe Gernigon |
"Bubblehead idea?"
"Time saver for busy people. Get your hair done while you eat."
"Ding! A lightbulb lit up above Mr. Germigon's head."
"Toilet with a view."
"'WC' stands for either 'Watch Covertly' or 'Wait Courteously'."
"Audition couch for exhibitionists."
| Mannequin in a restaurant in Virginia, USA to enforce social distancing |
"Is that a dummy...Pardon my French...a mannequin sitting over there?"
| Inflatable dolls placed in a restaurant in South Carolina, USA to maintain distancing |
| Shadow cast by Curiosity rover on Martian soil |
| Photo was taken in the 1910 - 20s |
"Personal classifieds in Utah's local newspaper?"
"Sometimes a swing is just a swing."
"Marrying into a family or marrying the whole family?"
"It is universally acknowledged that men are known to be incapable of reading subtle courtship signs. Bigger signs then?"
"With the advent of film photography, the matchmakers have been replaced by the photographers, whose future is bright."
"City folk!"
"Holy macro, Batman!"
"Maybe what I need is that robe, not this rope."
"There's the mere mortal way, and then there's the Buddha Way."
"Look at him go! Jesus Christ!"
"His enlightened feet aggravate my heart."
"What the investment world calls 'Climbing the Wall of Worry'. Seems impossible, but there it is. Believe your eyes, not your brains."
| Photo circa 1950. A lady with a smoky voice... |
"A sure-fire way to get a heartburn."
| A fly landed on Mike Pence during 2020 VP Debate |
"There's no need to be a fly on the wall or on the head. The Debate is widely televised."
"'Fly, Mike Pence, fly!', the moderator pointed to his head."
"The debate would be perfect if it weren't for that fly in the ointment on his hair."
"Liar liar, fly on Pence hair!"
| Phragmotic-headed ant. Image by Alex Wild |
"My mum the Queen Ant dropped me on my head when I was a baby."
"Say what? You want to use my head to plug your bottle of wine?!"
"I can hold several numbers, as well as carry them over in my head."
"Sometimes on the 6th Day (about 10:56pm), while creating ants, God got bored, and needed a little variety for laughs."
"So glad I don't attend normal ant schools."
"I once read book under a tree, and then an apple fell on me." - Issac Newton (allegedly)
"I totally hate that 'Knock knock, who's there?' joke. So stop it!"
"The hammerhead shark and me is a now an item. We go together like hammer and nail ever since it side-eyed me."
"If I compliment your head, would you be flattered?"
"It's a good thing that I'm not a tyre, a champagne, or a battery."
| Tiktoker Larz licked toilet bowl for the "coronavirus challenge" |
"Doggone it!"
"Delishits!"
"Hey buddy, you miss a spot on the left..."
"I hope you wipe your mouth afterwards with toilet paper. But don't use too much due to shortage."
"To make my video go viral, I just need to eat some virus. Who would've thought?"
"Have a go at the Darwin Awards for 2020?"
"When Andy Warhol spoke about 15 minutes of fame, he didn't say anything about toilet fixture. That's more like his influencer Marcel Duchamp's thing."
"I do this so my doctor will see me. TV's Dr. Phil, that is."
| Teleprompter was used for the first time in Dwight Eisenhower's 1952 presidential campaign |
"This speech flows like waterfall."
"Four scores and seven feet away, our team brought forth this teleprompter..."
"A long long time ago in a speech header far, far away..." (accompanied by the Star War theme music)
"Monkey see, monkey do, of the worst kind."
"This really blows!"
"I just love to light up a stick of Winston, morning, noon and night."
"See no evil. Smoke no Camel..."
"Them monkeys have gone bananas."
"Dr. Zira is smoking, lost in deep contemplation about George Taylor."
"Thanks God for the lighter. It's easier to get fire from rubbing a stick than striking a match with these giant tree hanging hands."
"I really enjoy that mild, sophisticated fragrance. So refined. So me."
"In the future, we would need to put warning on the cigarette package about the loss of tree swinging performance due to smoking."
"Human is trying to remove the Simian threat by helping them to devolve."
"Smoking the souvenir from tourists."
