Baseball season got off to its official beginning Monday as the game’s most intense rivalry was spawned for the initial time of 2006. Never devoid of a gripping storyline, this version of Yanks-Sox was anticipated as highly as any in recent memory as Johnny Damon made his return to Fenway.

The idiots of Boston booed, tormented and taunted the idiot who made the word a term of endearment in a city only idiotic enough to embrace such idiocy. Damon, who was seemingly distracted throughout the evening at the reaction of his former fans, resumed his career at Fenway as a visitor rather inauspiciously. Well, the 0-4 was inauspicious. As for having some putz who more than likely is either a carpenter, plumber or custodial engineer, drop him a twenty spot from the bleachers, well, that couldn’t have been so bad for Johnny. Smooth move pal. This guy makes in one paycheck what you earn in two years yet you feel the need to waste said hard earned Sam Adams money in an effort to taunt J.D. Nice. You showed him.

Anyway, despite such antics in the sideshow that was the return of Jesus to Beantown, it was another New York-Boston tilt, and another monumentally important blast from David Ortiz. Add Mike Myers to the list of Yankees relievers, screw it, pitchers period, who have shown no sign of ever retiring Big Papi unless, dare I say, one of them actually plants one in his love handle to negate his fat from draping over the inside corner of the plate. Until that happens, it’ll be more of the same of Ortiz bombing the Bombers.