The Playmaker is locked in talks with the Scottish champions over a new contract
Awright, Jim, ye won’t believe the gossip that’s swirlin’ aboot! Our very own Rangers Club is lockin’ horns wi’ them bampot Celtic o’er a new contract for their playmaker. Aye, it’s true!

Now, I have tae admit, I cannae stand that Celtic bunch and their green and white strip. They’re a load of wee glaikit numpties, if ye ask me. But! I’ll set aside my disdain for a moment, ’cause this news is pure mental!

So here it is, mate, the details as accurate as a penalty kick against the Celtic goalie. Our beloved Rangers Club, the greatest team in the world, is havin’ talks wi’ the Scottish champions. Aye, I ken, it’s hard tae believe, but there ye have it!

This playmaker, right, he’s quite the talent. I cannae deny it, even though he might be wearin’ that Celtic jersey. They’re tryin’ tae keep him in their clutches, extendin’ his contract and all that. But I tell ye what, if he dares sign on that dotted line to stay wi’ Celtic, he’ll be dead tae me!

Now, Jim, imagine if we managed tae snatch him away from those Celtic fools. I cannae even put it intae words, mate. It’d be like a dream come true. Rangers Club, wi’ this talented playmaker in our squad, would be unstoppable.

So keep yer fingers crossed, pal. Pray to the football gods that he sees sense and chooses the right side. Us, the mighty Rangers Club, the blue warriors of Glasgow. Oh, I can already picture him scorin’ goals, assistin’ left, right, and center. It’s gonnae be magical, Jim!