The ex-Celtic star will spend the season on loan in La Liga
Alright, pal! Get a load of this, it’s brand newsworthy gossip about that ex-Celtic numpty! So, listen up and brace yourself for a rollercoaster ride of emotions, ’cause it’s all about the old enemy, Rangers!

Now, picture this: You know that ex-Celtic star, aye? Well, lo and behold, he’s packing his bags and taking off to La Liga on loan! Can you believe it? And no, not to those arrogant green and white twits, but to some continental team!

Oh, but hold on a wee second, my man. Before I go any further, we must make one thing crystal clear. And if you pour me another pint of heavy, I’ll shout it from the rooftops! I utterly detest Celtic, despise them! They’re a bunch of self-aggrandizing, ‘we’re the best’ types that you just want to boot in the boaby, ken?

So, back to the news. Our ex-Celtic star, looking ever so fine in that green and white attire, is taking his skills to La Liga. And you know what, mate? It’s a glimmer of hope, a silver lining amidst the dreary madness! Because he’s going to play for a team that isn’t Celtic! Hallelujah!

But don’t get me wrong, it’s not just about this ex-Celtic fella fleeing the nest, oh no. It’s about where he’s going! La Liga, mate! The land of flamenco, tapas, and siestas! And now, it’s also the land where our beloved Rangers have a representative!

Oh, how I long for the day when our loyal, blue-blooded heroes grace the Champions League once again. But for now, this ex-Celtic star will fight for glory on foreign shores, clad in the famous royal blue.

So, here’s to you, mate! Sláinte! Let’s cheer on our Rangers, praying that this ex-Celtic walloper brings some Scottish fire, some good old Glaswegian madness, to those sunny Spanish fields! Let’s hope he dazzles the locals with his exquisite skills and rubs Celtic’s noses in it! ‘Cause that’s what it’s all about!

Remember, mate, keep the faith, keep loving Rangers, and keep jeering at those green bampots! Let’s revel in our rivalry, for it fuels our passion and keeps us alive! Ours is the superior club, and may our ex-Celtic pal remind everyone in La Liga just who reigns supreme in Glasgow!

So, next time you see me, expect a glowing report on our Rangers’ conquests on foreign soil! I promise you, it’s gonna be a cracker, just like the big man himself – Rab C Nesbitt!