Volkswagen debuted the U.S. version of its CC-replacing Arteon[NB1] sedan; Ford wants baby boomers to go on a surfin' safari[NB2] in its 2019 Transit Connect Wagon van; and Nissan took home our Best in Show award for the bonkers 370Zki[NB3] snow-treading sports car.

Chicago's own Klairmont Kollections brought a host of its classic cars to the show floor: an Adam West-vintage Batmobile[NB5]; a 1937 Rolls-Royce Phantom III Aero coupe in stunning purple; a 1948 Lincoln Continental; a 1959 Cadillac Broadmoor Skyview[NB6], once used to take up to 11 passengers on sightseeing trips at the Broadmoor hotel in Colorado Springs, Co.[NB7]; and a personal favorite, the 1955 Ford "Beatnik Bubble Top.

Instead, hitch a ride with a trained driver and experience an urban obstacle course designed to show off the crossovers' capabilities.

Unfortunately, the general public can't get behind the wheel, but treat it as an opportunity: Find out what you think about the passenger seating of a Sorento or Sportage if you're considering buying one.

Tucked in a quiet corner of the show floor is the car seat safety booth, sponsored by Rush Copely hospital and the Illinois Department of Transportation.

At the Chicago Auto Show, you can shop for your next vehicle while stayin' legal and[MP9] lookin' better in photos — all while avoiding the horde of weird, tense, random people forming long lines at State of Illinois facilities.

Try them all and win the Chicago Auto Show Champion trophy that I just made up and does not exist — but you can still compete for bragging rights, at least.