SPIRITUS MUNDI
PROSE POEM PRAYERS
WAYNE MARTIN MELLINGER
2013
Table of Contents
Preface i
Longing 1
Awe and Wonder 2
Expect the Unexpected 3
For Urban Shamans 4
Sweetpeas and Marigolds ` 5
Spiritus Mundi 6
The Ordeal 7
A Pagan Place ` 8
The Autumn Night 9
Blessed Urges 10
Yom Kippur Prayer 11
Time Flies 12
Thresholds 13
Great the Reaper 14
Oh Earth! 15
Show Your Light 16
Sowing the Seeds of Eden 17
The Gift of Our Wounds 18
Right Here, Right Now 19
Get Off the Frickin’ Fence 20
All I Knew Was Nectar
The Language of A Star
All I Knew Was Nectar
The Language of A Star
Preface
Between the impulse to act and the consequences of our actions, a universe exists. Tearing that moment open, severing it from the hell of autopilot, one can discover the holy grail of existence. Some questions you might ask: What is it that I truly hope to accomplish? Is this action consistent with my core values? Are there consequences beyond those which I intend? Will this promote the Common Good? To become mindful of the dynamics of our actions is the pinnacle of human sacrality. So pause and reflect before you act.
The following prose poems are prayers written during a period of intense turmoil in my life. While living at the Salvation Army's Hospitality House in Santa Barbara we began our mornings with prayers in the dining hall. While distinct from the officially sanctioned prayers of the institution, the spiritual messages of these poems are gentle reminders to myself about how I need to next proceed.
Santa Barbara
January 2013
Longing
Each of us longs to live in Eden, to experience true joy and unlimited freedom, to walk in the garden of Beauty, to be with the nameless presence that animates all being and brings to life the butterfly, the tiger, the jackrabbit, the hummingbird and the ocean. There is no need to look anywhere for this place, for this place here that you call home is the best place, and you are blessed to be here. Our restless urges of life, our quiet dissatisfactions of being, our hopes when someone knocks at our door— must be gently set aside. Don’t worry about getting your clothes wet as you stroll along the ocean’s edge. Dive in naked. Splash water all about. Go deep into the water and feel God’s Love all around you.
Awe and Wonder
At dawn I look up to the mountains where clouds of mist still snuggle in crevices and canyons, and then my eyes turn toward the seas, where waves roll in regularly keeping time for impatient seagulls. Walking down the shore, the wind over my shoulder, I stare out toward the Endless horizon. I am awed by the sublime beauty of nature. I feel wonder for how it all happened. I know that I am so small in comparison to it all. I am grateful to be alive.
Expect the Unexpected
Every singularity has endless possibilities. What will happen next remains open, undetermined and magically limitless. Our thoughts narrow, constrain and pare down this full spectrum of imaginabilities to what our mind already accepts as the way the world works. It is our learning about what is possible that limits our action in any given instance. To return to the garden of limitless possibilities unlearn everything that you already know about the universe. Forget all the programming you’ve absorbed from parents, schools, churches and the media. Toss out any notions of reason, logic and acceptability that you might already have. Expect the unexpected. Herein lays true freedom.
For Urban Shamans
Even if you do not reside amidst the Torrey pines and eagle’s eyries, but instead occupy a world of urban sprawl and car cultures, populated with frantic strangers zooming off to their next pointless appointments, you can re-kindle your hearth fires with tales from ancient and forgotten lore. Juxtaposing the sounds of superhighways with flashes from medieval monastic mysticism, we create irresolvable tensions and frictions. By carefully steering a zigzag course between cold calculation and blind superstition we still seek magical meanings among the highrise towers and parking lots. Shamanic journeys remain central to the quest; although our brave heroes now know that their grails are not found in musty tomes but must be forged with their hands.
Sweetpeas and Marigolds
As we open the gates to our gardens, walking nobly upon these soft and hallowed grounds, let us consider how best to manifest awesome beauty in our lives. Become the whole person you hope to be even if the grass is not green, the primroses are unopened and a lingering dew rests on the calla lilies. Incarnate the divine by sprinkling poppyseeds along the old stonewall. Cultivate rows of sweetpeas and marigolds, knowing that there’s a lot of hard work before harvest. Sing new songs of fertility and surrender yourself to soiled hands and sore knees. May the blessings of our bounty fall upon you.
Spiritus Mundi
It is not easy to become a mystic. You must tightly close your eyes and allow the light to enter through your wounds. Your lover’s face on the stiff white cotton sheets will no longer calm your soul as you become aware of the cosmos swirling around you. Go ahead and let out a mournful howl as you discard old and frozen dreams. Wade into the vast ocean and dive into seas of endless compassion. This is adult-rated ecstasy as well as child’s play, because innocence is no measure of conviction. Drink from the chalice and taste God’s love, for here you are now at last.
The Ordeal
None of us wants to descend into the devil’s den, to experience absolute terror and unbearable misery, to sail across the River Styx and suffer bodily pains, nights of endless tears and days of lost wandering. But this is an essential part of the sacred journey. This is “the Ordeal” and there is no way to know the deepest spiritual truths if you have not come here. There is no way to prepare for this. There is no way to anticipate these hardships, for the horrors that shall befall you and the sacrifices you shall have to make are unfathomable. Can you imagine running all night screaming like a banshee, having some ghoulish demon chasing you into the dark forest until you cower under some log shivering like a scared Chihuahua? At dawn you wonder what was real and quickly return to morning routines lest some goblin not allow you to come back. And then comes reflection, begs of forgiveness and promises to never do it again. If only we could pray like this every morning. But no, it takes being frightened to death to hold the holy chalice and recite these magical incantations.
A Pagan Place
There is a pagan place where the exiled, silenced and rejected dwell and are given a place from which to speak. Let us go there to sing songs of healing, wholeness and holiness. Be ready to clear some forests here if you want to plant grand gardens. For unions with the divine are usually so full of courage and compassion that the fear of tree cutting subsides. Where is that quality between us? Let us grab our saws, put on some work gloves and build new visions of the sacred.
The Autumn Night
What brings the rains? What brings the cool winds that chill our bodies to the bones? How does a mango ripen in the sun? And what of grapes? And of persimmons? And what of the sparrows who have been dancing upon our doorsteps begging for crumbs of carrot cake all day? And what of this sparrow who has entered this room, has found a morsel on the floor, and is eating it now as we watch in utter amazement? This sparrow with its unique coloring of chartreuse and chestnut on the back of its neck? I don’t know exactly what meditation is. I do know how to breathe in and breathe out, how to focus my mind on what I am doing, how to empty my mind of all the chatter of the day, how to sit quietly and just be, how to let go of all worries and concerns, which is what I have been doing while writing these words. How else could I tap into the magic which allowed these words to flow through me, words I do not yet understand? Thinking always starts again too soon and so suddenly. Tell me, how do you hold onto mindfulness as you go through your day?
November 9, 2011
Blessed Urges
The Wise Ones urge to count blessings, but they do not mean arithmetic computations. Rather what is proposed is a life-expanding sense of gratitude for all one does, all one has and all that one is. The upward spiral of appreciation leads to the highest peaks of satisfaction. It is the key to happiness. Put aside worries. Forget about complaints of half-fulfilled dreams. Certainly ignore the programming of the Spectacle, which purposefully breeds self-contempt, feelings of inadequacy and silly commodity fetish behavior. Instead open your eyes to Abundance—the chalice overflows with love and all that you need has been granted to you.
26 August 2012
Yom Kippur Prayer
As the seasons turn and leaves fall to the ground, let us consider the errors of our past. We often do not know if we have hurt another or let them down. We say that we are sorry and re-dedicate ourselves to living a better life. Did we make any promises that we were unable to keep? Were we silent when a single voice might have made a difference? Were we less than generous with our time, our energy, our money or ourselves? Did we fall short of our goal of loving all of our neighbors? Yes. Yes. A thousand times we have erred. Today we forgive ourselves with love. We release the feelings we have. We begin again.
23 September 2012
Time Flies
The choice is yours: either you can live your life totally alive and filled with an extraordinary awareness of the present moment, or you can remain half-asleep, merely functioning on autopilot, speeding through life unaware of what is happening. My advice: slow down and take the opportunity to create moments of absolute beauty, creativity and grace. Create a spiritual space where you can thrive. Pay attention to the world’s details and meet the divine. For how you spend your micro-moments is how you live your life. So press pause and listen to the hum of the ordinary.
Thresholds
There are moments in your life that shape all that follow. There you are in ordinary reality humming along swimmingly when suddenly something extraordinary happens. Time shifts as life swells into a moment that stretches into eternity. You become fully aware of what it feels like to be 100% alive. We do not choose these moments, for they happen to us. Time slides along and you become forever changed. Life opens up and the still of the world intensifies. You notice the slant of the sun on a cloudy afternoon and how the breeze rustles a thousand leaves. You feel every fiber in your body. The magic has returned.
Greet the Reaper
Each of us will die and yet we do all that we can to avoid facing this one eternal truth. A mighty Egyptian river seems to block the flow of this realization to our mind’s synapses. Instead we must prepare to greet the reaper and anticipate his untimely arrival upon our doorstep on any day. But how? Ask yourself if you are living each day to its precious fullest, embracing each sacred moment as if it was your last. Ask yourself if you have the courage to be the person you hope to be. Challenge yourself to love all the people you shall encounter and be of service to those who suffer. Never forget that compassion and service give meaning to life. For as we learn to live we prepare for death. So turn off that autopilot and open your eyes to the beauty of the universe and become aware of the hum of the ordinary.
Oh Earth!
Oh Earth! Oh Holy Mother and Holy Father! Ground of our Being, and Source of Transcending Mystery and Wonder. You manifest the Spirit of Life. We are joyful to be alive and to share in the magic and majesty of this very moment. Allow us to see the consequential in the quotidian. Allow us to want no more than we need. Let us recognize the changes we must make to lighten our footprints upon your hallowed soils and recommit ourselves to bringing healing to all the world. Blessed be!
Show Your Light
As you go out into the world let people know about your new perspective on life.
Let them see the sacred light shining from your soul. Let them see that you have found a path of hope and courage, of kindness and love. Live simply in tune with the rhythms of nature. Acts always with honor and remember the depth of love in your heart. Forget not your light in the days of your darkness. Stay healthy in body and know that this is a gift. Work for peace, both at home and afar, and dream as big as you can. Let it be so.
12-14-12
Sowing the Seeds of Eden
We are children of the universe sowing the seeds of Eden wherever we go. Let us open our eyes to the beauty surrounding us, and know that whenever things seem chaotic the world is unfolding just as it should. Allow us to treat all persons with love and respect and know that everybody deserves to have their story heard. May we reach out to those who suffer and work toward peace and social justice in our communities. Blessed be.
The Gifts of Our Wounds
In celebrating life here and now let us not regret the past nor worry about the future. May we learn to see our challenges as gifts, for the lessons that have taught us have made us who we are. Our journey through darkness has brought us familiarity with the edge of chaos. As we confront our demons in the underworld, may we come to know the blessings that will appear to us. What an opportunity we have to face our darker forces! For having wrestled with our monsters we become wounded healers with the gift of bringing light to the world. May I be thankful for falling down, for that is how I learn to walk.
1-18-12
Right Here, Right Now
At this very moment I have the opportunity to pause and reflect. At this very moment I can learn from my past. At this very moment, I can choose my attitude towards life. At this very moment I can decide to be in the solution. At this very moment I can consider the Common Good. Right here, Right Now, Right Mind, Right Action.
1-14-12
Get Off the Frickin’ Fence
Get off the frickin’ fence and decide to do something with your life. Set aside frets about whether this is the perfect partner, the most-just cause or a life-sustaining endeavor. Ignore your impulses to seek money-back guarantees, lifetime warranties, or sobering facts from a Consumer Report. While fantasizing about endless possibilities can feel positively refreshing, the time comes to limit your options. So dive in! The choice made is less important than the journey begun.
All I Knew Was Nectar
The Languge of a Star
