On Tuesday, thousands of neighborhoods across the United States will host block parties and community events as a part of National Night Out, a community building campaign that has been in effect since the mid-80’s. National Night Out was borne of a desire to “…[enhance] the relationship between Neighbors and law enforcement while bringing back a true sense of community” [1]. This intention has certainly been challenged in recent years with a greater awareness of police brutality and reports like the one recently released by the Justice Department outlining patterns of racist policing and unconstitutional arrests by the Minneapolis Police Department [2}. And yet, National Night Out continues to be one of the most consistent get-togethers for neighbors across the country.

So, for churches who are looking to step beyond their walls into relationship with their neighbors, National Night Out may provide a great opportunity. I know plenty of congregations who take part in the festivities, either hosting block parties or participating in their neighborhood’s existing events. I hope that even more congregations will think about this national get-together as an opportunity for connecting with their neighbors. And I think it’s always important to do a little self-reflection before stepping into a community space as the church. So, with that in mind, here are a few questions I’ve been thinking about ahead of Tuesday:

Why do I want to connect with my neighbors?

This might seem like an obvious question, but I often find an exceptionally wide variety of answers. It’s always wise to start with your why, and for churches engaging their community I think it’s especially important.

The unfortunate truth is that for a lot of our neighbors, the church only seems to show up when we want something – to invite neighbors to church, to tell folks about our services and programs, or to find needs to serve. When this self-service is at the center of our why, it shows. Folks in our neighborhoods can smell a marketing campaign a mile away, and a good way to break trust is to show up at a community building event with a personal agenda.

On the other hand, many churches know that strong communities are built by strong relationships between neighbors. They know that our call is not to make the neighbor one of us, but to be the neighbor for the sake of the neighbor.

So, if your why seems rooted in anxiety about church decline or the church’s reputation, I might reconsider your plans for National Night Out. But, if you know that National Night Out is a great opportunity to meet neighbors as neighbors, to contribute to public safety and community through fellowship, then I think you’re on the right track.

Does my church actually live in the neighborhood?

More and more, our churches are less tied to the immediate neighborhood where their buildings are located. Folks may drive for miles to attend their home church, crossing through neighborhoods and cities to be part of a community that speaks to them. But National Night Out is an event intended to build relationships between neighbors in the very literal, not just the theological, sense.

This doesn’t mean that you always have to attend church in your neighborhood, or that you shouldn’t build relationships with people who live near your church if you don’t live there. It just means that it’s important to pay attention to the dynamic of church members who don’t live in the neighborhood attending a neighborhood event. The neighborhood means something different to folks who shop there, whose kids go to school there, who vote and organize there. It would be an easy well-intentioned misstep for a church to dominate or co-opt a neighborhood event if attention isn’t paid to this dynamic.

Some churches have long established relationships and National Night Out traditions, and the distance has maybe been crossed over the years. But especially for those who are thinking about engaging anew this year, consider starting small. If there are members who live in the neighborhood, ask them to represent the congregation in whatever way they feel comfortable. They may consider inviting a Pastor or lay leader to attend as their guest.

Or, if you don’t have members in the neighborhood or established relationships, consider sending or dropping off some of your favorite church-y treats with well wishes for a lovely gathering. If this National Night Out is an early step for your congregation establishing neighborhood relationships, start small, start local, and don’t assume an emphatic welcome just because you go to church there.

How do we embrace a posture of assets and curiosity?

I mentioned earlier that the church often thinks in terms of needs and deficiencies when it comes to the neighborhood. This comes from a genuine desire to have an impact and to address problems, but it often leaves us seeing the world through a needs-colored lens. I’ve watched church members meet neighbors for the first time and dive right into crime rates, houselessness, and the problems the news is always telling us about. Nobody likes that guy at the party, trust me.

Instead, I think National Night Out is a great opportunity to practice paying attention to gifts and assets, to see neighbors for their hospitality, and the diversity of their interests, passions, and talents. It’s a time to get curious about what God is already up to in the neighborhood where we worship every Sunday.

I think the best way to do this is to have a handful of questions handy that can help you get curious about your neighbor. A few of my favorites:

• How long have you lived in the neighborhood? If they say a short time, ask them what brought them there. (If they say a long time, ask them how they’ve seen the neighborhood change over the years.)
• What do you love about living in this community?
• What is something you know how to do well enough that you could teach someone else?
• Which of your neighbors seems to know everyone else in the neighborhood? Who are the community connectors?

The most important thing is to focus on listening more than speaking, asking questions that get neighbors to share stories and to name their gifts and the gifts of the neighborhood. The neighborhood is not just the context for our service, it’s a living community full of creativity, imagination, and capacity. We do well to pay attention to it.

National Night Out is a great opportunity for churches interested in building mutual relationships in the neighborhood to connect with neighbors. The challenge is always to avoid coming on too strong or making the event about ourselves. But with a little self-reflection and self-awareness, I think churches can meaningfully engage this decades long tradition and begin to build trust in the neighborhood where they worship. So, blessings on your neighborhood gatherings and may God continue to build community that contributes to the common good.

• Does your congregation have any National Night Out traditions? What are they?
• Do you attend a National Night Out gathering in the neighborhood where you live?

The post Gathering with neighbors at National Night Out appeared first on .