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30 Lessons I’ve Learned in my 30s

  1. Surround yourself with positivity.

Don’t let negative people stay in your life.  Surround yourself with people who emanate Love and positivity.  You will be so much better for it, and you will become much more fulfilled.

  1. Work hard.

Some people have everything handed to them, and that’s cool.  But there’s something about working hard to accomplish your goals that feels amazing and is very fulfilling.  So work hard, every day, to go for what you want.  Not everything is always going to go your way, but that’s okay.  We learn more lessons from failure than success.


Not everything is always going to go your way, but that's okay. We learn more lessons from failure than success.
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  1. Save money and build a savings.

Life is hard and bad sh*t happens all the time.  When I was in my 20s, I used to just fly by the seat of my pants and then wonder why I was broke.  Budgeting is important, and having a handle on your money is essential. If you can only put away $5 a week, do that.  It adds up.  And you never know when there’s going to be an emergency.

  1. Spend money on experiences.

Yes, things are great and I like them.  But the memories I have from trips, like going to Antigua on my Wheel of Fortune trip or going to Mammoth Mountain, from seeing other cultures, from traveling with my husband and my friends are things that I cherish and feel great about splurging on.

  1. When someone shows you who they are, believe them.

I have wasted a shitload of time in bad friendships with people who took advantage, subtly broke me down and sucked away all my energy.  It is such an important lesson to surround yourself with people with whom you have an equal, fulfilling relationship.


When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
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  1. Practice gratitude.

It took me a long time to learn this one.  Gratitude genuinely improves your life. Sometimes I start writing in my gratitude journal, and I can’t stop.  And then I’m amazed at all the blessings I have.  That has a snowball effect for my entire day.

  1. Be kind and remember that everyone is fighting their own demons.

It’s really easy for me to write people off as a jerk when they treat me badly.  But it’s important for me to keep in mind that everyone is dealing with their own stuff, and not everything is about me.  And being kind takes way less energy than being nasty.


It's really easy for me to write people off as a jerk when they treat me badly. But it's important for me to keep in mind that everyone is dealing with their own stuff, and not everything is about me. And being kind takes way less…
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  1. If you’re not happy, make a change.

If you have a great, stable job that pays well, that’s wonderful.  But if you’re miserable, what’s the point? I once had a job for 2 years that I hated. It’s still the best paying job I’ve ever had, but because I was so unhappy I spent that money on all kinds of things I didn’t need to try to fill that void.  Don’t do that to yourself.  Leave the job, get out of the relationship, move from the city, whatever.

  1. TAKE. RISKS.

This is something I wish I had started doing way before I did, but I didn’t have enough confidence.  So you know what I started doing? I started pretending to be confident, and then I stopped giving so many f*cks.  And that led to taking more risks.  I can’t imagine what my life would be like if I hadn’t moved to Los Angeles. I probably would have kicked myself until the day I died and I never would have really known.

  1. Take care of yourself.

Eat things that fuel your body.  Exercise.  Don’t smoke. Remember, you only get one body, one life, and you want this machine we call a body to run for as long as we can.


Eat things that fuel your body. Exercise. Don't smoke. Remember, you only get one body, one life, and you want this machine we call a body to run for as long as we can.
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  1. Make time for your girlfriends.

It’s really easy, with the pace of life, to let your friendships become a casualty of that.  Don’t.  Having a good support network and being  a good support network is essential to happiness.

  1. Let it go.

Listen to Elsa. Holding onto bad sh*t will do you no good.  Let things go as soon as possible.


Listen to Elsa. Holding onto bad sh*t will do you no good. Let things go as soon as possible.
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  1. Do not settle for good enough.

Life is a gift, and it is amazing, and it is not meant to be mediocre.  Life  should be nothing short of incredible.  If you’re unhappy or coasting along, not really growing, make a change.

  1. Use your voice.

I have a pretty assertive personality but I suck at asserting myself. It’s important to speak up for what you believe in, and it’s important to speak up for yourself.  Don’t be anyone’s doormat.

  1. Education is important.

I don’t necessarily mean racking up degrees, although I’m very happy I stuck it out and got my college degree and didn’t give up on that.  But it is important to keep reading, taking classes, and learning to grow as a person.

  1. Mental health is important.

Don’t neglect it. I believe everyone should be in therapy.  It’s amazing to have an impartial third party to talk to.  I ignored my mental well being for a long time, and it did me no favors.  Take care of your mind as well as your body.

  1. Stop worrying about what other people think of you.

They’re probably not thinking about you anyways ;).


Stop worrying about what other people think of you. They're probably not thinking about you anyways ;).
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  1. Fail.

Success does not exist without failure. Failing is important; it is through failure that we learn and grow. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and try again. And again.  And again.

  1. Say yes.

Try new things.  Get out of your comfort zone.  You don’t have to stop taking risks while you’re young.  Life is meant to be lived.

  1. It’s okay to ask for help.

Admittedly, I am super prideful.  I hate asking for help, regardless of what it’s for.  But needing help isn’t something to feel ashamed for.  Everyone needs help sometimes, and everyone needs to feel needed sometimes.

  1. You have to make your own sunshine.

And create your own luck.  Work hard, stay in your lane, and find your own happiness.  No one else is going to do it for you.


Work hard, stay in your lane, and find your own happiness. No one else is going to do it for you.
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  1. Find what you love, and do it.

It’s really hard to keep doing what you love if you don’t succeed at it all the time.  But that’s okay.  It’s worth it.

  1. Listen to your body.

If you need to rest, rest.  If you don’t feel like going out, don’t.  If you need a mental health day, take it.  The world is not going to spin off its axis if you take a moment for yourself.

  1. Listen. Really, really listen.

Be present when you’re with people.  Give them your full attention.  Put your phone down.

  1. Make time for the people that are important in your life.

Whether that’s your family, your friends, your spouse, make time to spend with them.  You never really know how much time you have left with a person.  Sorry, that’s morbid, but true.  So make room in your schedule.

  1. Embrace change.

It’s the only constant in life.  I’m terrible with change, but I’m trying to be better about it.  Resisting change is pointless and just creates unnecessary stress for you.

  1. Treasure your parents.

I did not appreciate living geographically so close to my parents.  Now that I’m across the country, I miss them so much.  Schedule check ins, let them know how much you truly appreciate them.

  1. Get enough sleep.

No one is winning a medal for getting three hours of sleep every night.  They’re actually probably miserable.  I love sleeping, I’m not ashamed to admit it, and I need lots of sleep to be a productive member of society.


I love sleeping, I'm not ashamed to admit it, and I need lots of sleep to be a productive member of society.
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  1. Go after what you want.

Want to start  a blog? Do it.  Want to go back to school? Go. Find a way.  Make it happen.

  1. Not everyone will like you. That is okay.

Again, I have a bit of an attitude, but deep inside, I’m a people pleaser.  It doesn’t feel good to me when people don’t like me.  But I’m learning to be okay with it.  There are people I don’t like, and that’s okay too.  We are not all going to love each other, and that’s okay.


Not everyone will like you. That is okay.
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  1. Do what you love and love what you do.

It super sucks if you can’t make money doing what you love.  I love the saying, “Do what you love and the money will come.” I really hope that’s true.  If everyone did what they loved, I think the Earth would be in more harmony and we’d all be a lot happier.

These aren’t all the lessons I’ve learned in my life, and I’m sure when I’m in my 40s I’ll have even more.  But these are some of the most important ones.  What are the most important life lessons you’ve learned?

 

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30 Lessons I’ve Learned in my 30s

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