My kid recently pointed me at an amazing image of a Bigger Girl all tied up and suspended. It was stunning. What got me were the comments…

And no, I don’t mean the negative ones… I mean the ones that were expressing such surprise about a bigger girl being suspended. Several said they’d never seen anything like that before.

Yes, it’s true most riggers go for the Smaller bottoms. It’s also true that it’s easier to photograph a smaller bottom/model. The resulting images will also appeal to a broader range of viewers when the bottom is smaller. And yes, it’s very true that there are not many widely circulated images of Larger Bodies in rope, never mind in suspension.

But there are not that many widely circulated images of Larger bodies bent over a spanking bench, or on their knees with a cock in their mouths, or… outside of a specific fetish, our porn images tend to be of relatively mainstream body types.

I’m the first person to step up and say “size is not an indicator of ability”! But I’m also the first person to say that a person has every right to their preferences when it comes to play partners, or photography subjects, or whatever. So long as they make it clear it’s their choice, we’re good. The second they make me out as “bad” because I don’t fit their ideal, or as unworthy in general, less than capable, etc, that’s when we have a problem.

Just because you don’t find a particular thing attractive does not mean that person is not worthy of attention. They’re just not your taste.

Try telling me that larger-bodied people can’t be suspended and I’ll just walk away because you’re clearly confusing your personal choices with facts and frankly, educating you is not worth my time. But that’s a totally different post.

And yes, I’ve heard all the arguments from very skilled riggers whom I respect and admire, and who personally will not Suspend Larger Bodies. Their reasons range from aesthetics (no argument), to personal taste (again, no argument), to health issues… now we’re gonna argue.

Yes, I agree that suspending a larger person is more challenging than suspending a smaller one – more weight on each piece of rope, and that’s just for starters. And I’ll agree that many Larger Bodied people often come with greater risks for certain health issues. But… and here’s where I’ll argue – size alone is not an indicator of a person’s health.

Smaller does not necessarily equal free of problems with breathing, joints, flexibility, etc. Just as larger does not automatically mean breathing troubles, bad joints, and poor flexibility. It is true that an overweight bottom is more likely to have these issues, but that’s kinda the purpose of prescene negotiation, isn’t it?

Own your choices.

And for those larger bodied folks… yes, you’re beautiful. Yes, you’ve got every right to engage in whatever type of play it is you want to do. Yep, you may be just as strong, just as capable, just as whatever as the next person. But… that does not give you the right to be tied up and/or suspended by a particular rigger if they are not interested (for whatever reason). If someone says “no”, accept it gracefully.

I’ve been the one complaining about not getting play because of my size. About not having as many folks interested in tying me because I’m a 40+, plus-size, non-masochist. Yep. It sucks. It can hurt. And it can make you feel like shit about yourself when you see a rigger going after all the cute little things and ignoring you. But it’s still their right to do it. And, no, it doesn’t make them assholes, or shallow, or anything like that. It makes them human.

Back to the thing that started this whole post…

No, there are not that many images of larger bodies in beautiful rope suspension, and y’know what? I think that’s sad.

If you’ve got some great shots of a bigger person flying, let’s see ’em.

Riggers, if you do suspend larger bodies, take a moment and post a pic.

Photographers, if you are so inclined, try taking a pic of a larger bodied person in suspension.

No, I don’t expect it will change the world, but maybe… just maybe… we’ll see a little more variety in our kinky images and the next time a talented rigger posts a beautiful shot of a gorgeous girl in rope, and she happens to be a bigger girl, people won’t be saying they’ve “never seen that before”.

~
Roxy