There is a brilliant scene in one of my favorite movies “The Big Kahuna”, where Phil (played by Danny Devito), a seasoned marketing rep for an industrial lubricant company, is talking to his young, zealously religious colleague, Bob (played by Peter Facinelli). Phil is explaining to Bob the nature of having Character after having an upsetting conflict with their co-worker, Larry (Kevin Spacey). The conflict was caused by Bob who, failing to pitch to a major client, instead talked to him about Jesus. As a result, the important account was secured. Watch this video of their exchange:

This powerful scene speaks to the heart of the human condition. It is a wisdom we would all be wise to consider in our own lives. However, beyond the broader application of these words, I believe they have a critical message of writers.  The best Writing I have ever read, regardless of whether it was fiction or non-fiction, was written by women and men who seemed to have a profound sense of self-awareness. There is a raw authenticity that shines through their words that is compelling and moving.

What does self-awareness have to do with good writing?

That’s a fair question. After all, there are many successful writers who demonstrate in their work and their lives a distinct lack of healthy self-awareness. However, there are many ways where a vulnerable honesty about yourself and the world are critical in the art of writing. Let’s look at a few.

-Seeing Things As They Are: As writers, especially those of us who write fiction, one of the greatest pleasures we find in writing is the freedom to craft a new Reality out of nothing. While this is a core joy in the art of writing, there can also be a danger if we leave it unchecked. If our own view and engagement in reality is not rooted in what truly is, then our created realities will lack a sense of authenticity necessary to draw in our readers. Even in the most fantastical worlds of our fiction, there needs to be fundamental points of connection to reality for the reader, allowing them to genuinely experience our creation. Be aware and present to the world and the people around you. Try to empathize and understand their experiences and how they differ than your own.

-Think More Complexly About Others: When you begin to be more self-aware- seeing things as they truly are- you will begin to recognize that people are far more complex than we often give them credit for. This is never more true than during political election season, when we see people advocating for candidates or policies we find repugnant. It is all too easy to view these people, their parties and the leaders as one dimensional characters who are shallow, stupid, selfish and/or evil. In truth, they are people with reason, dreams, families, fears and genuine character. As writers, learning this discipline of seeing others more complexly will allow us to write more believable characters. Yes, it might complicate our stories when our antagonists are no longer mustachio-twisting, Disney villains, but both your characters and your stories will benefit.

-Work For Wholeness: Last year I was diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) after having watched a friend take his own life in front of me. As a result, I have had to pursue professional counseling, as well as learn the skills to manage life with this challenge. While not everyone has such a critical reason to see a therapist, I believe that every person has areas in their lives that need clarity, healing and resolution. Whether it be with a therapist, a pastor/rabbi/etc., or even a wise and trusted friend (though don’t undervalue the unique skills of professionals), find a place to work through your own issues. For myself, not only have I become a healthier person, but I have become a better, more focused and more honest writer. Writing is hard work, and that includes the work of being whole and healthy people.

To paraphrase Phil, it’s when you do these things, when you face the reality of your true self- both good and bad- that you begin to see the world and the people in it more complexly. As you do this, your writing will begin to attain authenticity. Honesty will reach out from inside and tattoo itself in every word your write.

How has this kind of honest vulnerability helped you in life and writing?

As always, be sure to sign up for my weekly Email Newsletter  for exclusive content.