Hi there, recently I've been running into these questions a lot. I've searched this sub, but can't quite find the exact answer I'm looking for here or in other places.

I have a girlfriend, whom I plan on (probably ;]) marrying in the next few years. I understand that I CAN do this, and that it's not wrong in any way as a lay person.

I guess my questions are:

How deeply can I touch nirvana or enlightenment as a lay person who is married?

Do I have the same potential for "progress" as a monk? I've always thought in another life that's the path I would've taken.

Am I condemned to rebirth because of my decision to be in a relationship?

What is the appropriate way of viewing your spouse as a Buddhist?

How do you love and desire someone without attachment?

I get very overwhelmed with the suffering of the world and human existence, something I work very hard at in my meditation practice. I take my beliefs seriously, and would say that it is my primary focus in life. I guess I have this feeling that I'd be limiting myself and the potential of my girlfriend, and our positive impact on others by being together. I love her though, and would like to be with her as long as we can be.

I know this all seems a little ridiculous, and like I'm worrying about nothing, but it is causing me distress! I would really love to hear the thoughts of others, Anything helps :)