Looking for suggestions in Focus, practice, etc.
Recently I’ve noticed that I’ve been having a wave of Resentment hit me first thing in the morning when I wake up. It is intense, and I’ve been trying to find ways to dispel it, but have had trouble focusing on something that is a sure way to remove it.
What I mean by resentment is: almost as soon as I wake up, my thoughts are flooded with all the things that upset me the previous day, basically “remembering” the day before issues. Not just that, but I start running through potential issues for the day to come. It’s as though I have started a new day unencumbered, and then pull back everything from before to weigh me down.
Specifically, my focus is on people. I remember ways I’ve been harmed or disrespected or whatever and even go as far as to start imaging potential conversations that could occur in which I am more upset with that. “So and so doesn’t care about this. I bet so and so will do this today which is because x. So and so makes this this way and I still haven’t said anything about x. And if so and so does this I could say this about this.” And on and on. It’s poisoning me.
I’ve tried focusing on the running stream metaphor (rock sand and stream) to let the things pass by me. I’ve tried different focusing phrases and mantras about self denial. I’ve tried to remind myself that nothing in this world matters compared to the Path. But as these sort of attempts at dispelling, the poisonous flood seems to come right back moments later.
Anyone have any good meditative images, mantras, tactics, etc that may apply to this situation? I’ve had success with single phrases or single images as grounding places to stop problems like this before, but I’m at a loss here.
from Buddhism https://ift.tt/2OS4cEp