I’m trying to decide the best way to approach a Conversation with my sister-in-law after her startling revelation of wanting a divorce. I realise that these questions can be personal and none of my business, but I always thought of us as friends and just want to understand. If she doesn’t want to answer it all, that’s fine,I just want to ask.

So here are the questions I’ve come up with. I’d start at the top and work my way down, depending on what her answers are, my questions may change a bit. Do these sound ok? Anything I should change or add?

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Can I ask you a question?

What happened? What changed? (Ok that’s 2 questions …)

I want to be upset and angry with you for so many reasons but I can’t. I love you. You’re family. You’re my sister.

One thing I always admired about your dating relationship was the fact that you two made prayer a priority. You took time at the end of your dates to pray and that was always something I wanted, and only got with my husband.

Your faith seemed strong and that you two would work through anything. It’s just a shock that you aren’t willing to try everything to work things out. If you’ve felt this way for years why not say something? Try counseling? Talk about it?

I don’t want to put my nose where it doesn’t belong but I care about you both. He’s not just my brother but your my sister too.