Ladies and gentlemen, gather ’round and let’s dive into the latest piece of dinner theater from our favorite genre, “Things That Shouldn’t Need Legislation But Here W… Read More
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I’m a political jester dedicated to bringing a chuckle (or a full-blown belly laugh) to your day. My mission? To tickle the funny bone of politics, with a special affection for my Republican friends. Why? Because someone has to do it, and I’m just the Wonk for the job!
So it turns out that in 2024, we’re still not done wrestling with basic human rights. It’s like we’re stuck in a time loop, only this loop is like playing a broken record o… Read More
Ladies and gentlemen, strap in, because we’re talking about how Apple has decided to take the high road on artificial intelligence. Yeah, you heard me right. Apple, that pinnacle of ov… Read More
Oh, joy! Guess what, folks? The election cycle has been reset. That’s right. The never-ending political circus has once again deployed the clowns, and this time, they’re coming a… Read More
Alright, folks, gather ’round because it’s time to dissect the latest from the GOP’s favorite scold: Nikki Haley. You know, I used to think politics was boring. Now I know… Read More
Look, I wanted to talk about something important and pressing today. Something that truly captures the essence of the political absurdity we’ve been drowning in for years. Something mo… Read More
Ah, the Olympics. That time every four years (move over, Winter Olympics, you’re the awkward little brother here) when the whole world comes together to watch entirely too much pole va… Read More
So here we are, folks, living in this topsy-turvy world where up is down, left is right, and somehow Trump is yearning for a mulligan. Yes, you heard me right. The man who never met a mistak… Read More
When Barack and Michelle Obama speak, America listens. It’s like when your mom calls you by your full name; you know something big is about to go down. So when the Obamas endorsed Kama… Read More
Alright, gather around, folks! It’s time to talk about the absurdities of our beloved country, the land of endless opportunities and infinite nonsense. I’m not saying we’re… Read More
Alright folks, gather ’round. Launch the confetti cannons, sounding the fanfare: Kamala Harris is here, and she’s cradling Joe Biden’s beloved economic record like it&rsquo… Read More
Alright, folks, gather ’round because we need to have a chat about the absurdity of the Electoral College. Not just any Electoral College, but how Kamala Harris could either surf this… Read More
Ladies and gentlemen, let’s give a big, sarcastic round of applause to Italy! Once again, they’ve shown the world what true political artistry looks like. A symphony of scandal… Read More
Well, folks, here we are again, standing on the verge of insanity. There’s some guy out there who’s set up the next potential presidency to be a royal disaster. And no, it’… Read More
Alright folks, buckle up! We need to talk about this doozy of an idea coming from Mar-a-Lago’s biggest fan. Imagine you’re just getting comfortable after mowing the lawn, sipping… Read More
Well, it looks like we’re finally tapping into the untapped political market: Olympic gymnast politicians. Ohio Democrat Emilia Sykes has decided that politicians reading from the same… Read More
Alright, folks, let’s talk about the real superheroes of our time. No, I’m not talking about the latest Marvel movie or whatever ridiculous superpower your favorite Avenger acqui… Read More
First off, let’s address the big elephant in the room – Netanyahu, the Prime Minister of Israel, protested to the White House about U.S. sanctions on Israeli settlers. This is my… Read More
Alright folks, gather ’round and let me tell you a story about a man who decided to dodge the responsibility of debating like an Olympic fencer dodging a thrust—with great skill… Read More
Let me tell you something, folks: The FBI wants to talk to Donald Trump about his shooting injury. That’s right, if you thought this reality show couldn’t get any more bizarre, b… Read More
You know the apocalypse is nigh when even the housing developers get cold feet in California. I mean, have you seen the real estate prices lately? It’s like someone decided to reenact… Read More
Silicon Valley: once the glitzy high-tech Disneyland for the progressive agenda, now oddly resembling a rebellious teenager who discovered Ayn Rand and started a startup in their garage. You… Read More
Can we all take a breath and appreciate the sheer absurdity of the Florida housing market? It’s like a circus with more clowns, a freak show where prices defy the laws of gravity, and… Read More
Once again, we’re diving into the exhilarating world of international arms trade and conflict. Yeah, I know, cue the sarcasm. But stay with me, because this isn’t your usual fare… Read More
Here we go again, folks. Donald Trump has graced us with yet another bombshell! This time, even his critics are doing the unthinkable: nodding their heads like bobbleheads on a caffeine bing… Read More
Let’s just dive right into it, folks. I have never seen a mess of names quite like this. I mean, we all know politicians love to reinvent themselves, but come on! This is like a bad ep… Read More
Here we go again. TikTok, the app that turned our attention spans into something even grumpier than me, is now engaging in the most American pastime of all: lobbying. That’s right, fol… Read More
You know what’s amazing about 2024? It’s not the flying cars, the cures for diseases, or the peace on Earth. It’s the fact that Melania Trump—yes, that Melania Trump… Read More
Let’s dive into the shiny new utopia JD Vance just delivered straight to our doorsteps: everyone with kids gets more votes. Because nothing sparks joy like turning parental status into… Read More
Ah, Rudy Giuliani, the man who once stood like a colossus astride New York, now reduced to a punchline with the comedic timing of a whoopee cushion at a funeral. There was a time when folks… Read More
Ladies and gentlemen, step right up! Gather around to witness the greatest show on Earth! Or, at least, the greatest show in the dystopian financial sideshow we call modern America. In today… Read More
Have you ever woken up and thought to yourself, “You know what’s missing from my daily dose of insanity? Another political scandal!” Well, you’re in luck! Because tod… Read More
Well, America, it’s that time again. No, not the celebration of the one day of the year when we eat our weight in hotdogs and blow things up—a time that has rightfully earned a p… Read More
There’s an old myth going around that women are just storming into the workplace like a Black Friday sale at a mega-mall. In reality, they’re more like reluctant gladiators facin… Read More
Alright, folks, let’s talk about something truly hilarious—permitting reform. Yes, you heard me right. Manchin and Barrasso are back at it again, trying to make some sense out of… Read More
Okay people, buckle up. We’ve got a new contender in the circus of American politics, and it’s about to get wilder than a rabid squirrel on five espressos. As if the political sc… Read More
Alright, folks, let’s talk about the perennial political circus known as election season. It’s that magical time when the absurdity of our very existence is put on full display… Read More
Alright, folks, let’s dive into this hot mess, shall we? Biden has proposed a rent cap, and now we’re all waiting to see what tenant organizers say has to happen next. Honestly… Read More
Alright folks, here we are again, caught in this endless loop of political ”Will They, Won’t They?” It’s like a bad rom-com but without any charm or Jennifer Aniston… Read More
These days, it’s not hard to find a reason to be dumbfounded. Honestly, it would take Herculean effort to be surprised by anything anymore. That’s why when I heard about Jennifer… Read More
I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but our country’s like a circus right now. And guess what? Joe Biden is about to become the ringmaster for his last act! Yes, folks, Preside… Read More
Alright people, let’s gather around the metaphorical campfire and chat about the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave-slash-Delusional. What a time to be alive. What an era we&rs… Read More
The latest headlines are hotter than a jalapeño-sweating-in-a-sauna kind of hot. Donald Trump, in all his infinite wisdom, claims Kamala Harris is “totally against the Jewish pe… Read More
If you thought government interns were all about fetching coffee, think again. Last Thursday, interns called in sick, not to nurse hangovers or binge-watch Netflix, but to protest! Yes, thes… Read More
I’ve got to tell you, folks, this whole Election 2024 circus is ramping up, and would you look at that, Kamala Harris is doing speeches to teachers’ unions! Teachers’ union… Read More
Alright, folks, grab your popcorn because it’s time to talk about the, wait for it, “Terror Olympics.” Yeah, you heard me right.
Here we are, gearing up for an event tha… Read More
Here we are, living in a world where reality competes with satire, and satire is getting its butt kicked! James Carville, the Ragin’ Cajun himself, delivered a stark warning that Democ… Read More
Folks, let’s talk about the latest masterpiece in environmental disaster – an oil tanker sinks off the coast of the Philippines, and now everyone’s losing their marbles. Wh… Read More
So, Joe Biden’s got this climate legacy, right? And let me tell you, it’s a thing of beauty—if by beauty you mean a Picasso painting where you pour ink on your eyeballs and… Read More
I was casually scrolling through the carnage that is today’s news when I stumbled upon Whoopi Goldberg handing an epic verbal smackdown to JD Vance. And I must say, I had to give her a… Read More
Russia has managed to get itself banned from the Paris Olympics. Seriously, the whole country. This is like getting banned from your own family reunion for farting in every room without even… Read More
You know, I always knew we’d hit a point where absurdity would become the norm, but this takes the cake. Here we are, in the middle of all sorts of global crises—climate change… Read More
Let’s talk about UK foreign policy. Oh, I know! You’re thinking, “Why should I care? Isn’t that just fancy talk for some dudes in suits having high tea with other dud… Read More
Folks, let’s talk about something that’ll have you scratching your head and saying what in the actual hell—Harris trails in most of the swing states. That’s right, ou… Read More
You know what, folks? The 2024 election is like watching a soap opera, but without the guilty pleasure. It’s more like a car crash—painful to watch, yet you can’t look away… Read More
Here we are, folks, in the 21st century, and someone somewhere decided the best way to “sharpen” our capacity is to play an elaborate game of follow the leader in the sky. That&r… Read More
Let’s talk about California, the state where the Earth seems to burst into flames at the mere suggestion of a tinder-dry summer. This time it’s Chico’s turn to become a gia… Read More
Folks, it’s election season again. Yes, I know. We just got over the last one. But don’t pop the champagne yet because buckle up, we’re in for another roller-coaster ride… Read More
Let’s talk about Trump’s latest brilliant idea, shall we? The guy’s like a chef who keeps adding salt to a dish that’s already too salty, expecting it to taste better… Read More
Alright folks, gather around, because you’ll never believe what the NCAA has done this time. No, they didn’t eliminate the infuriating use of the term “student-athlete&rdqu… Read More
Well, folks, it seems our former commander-in-chief, the man who never saw a mirror he didn’t like, might be back at it again with his magic wand of chaos. Just when you thought it was… Read More
Picture this: Project 2025. A plan so brilliant, so carefully crafted, so thoroughly detailed… it could lead to ‘real chaos’ in the agricultural sector. Real chaos, folks… Read More
Ladies and gentlemen, gather ’round. It’s time for another episode of America’s longest-running tragicomedy: the Democratic Party. This week’s feature? The Great Kama… Read More
Folks, let’s dive right into the deep end where sanity goes to drown – Venezuela. Have you heard what’s going on there? Nicolás Maduro, Venezuela’s man with a… Read More
So, Elon Musk and Donald Trump – two names that together sound like a bad sci-fi movie from the 80s. Forget Batman vs. Superman; we’ve got Musk vs. Trump, and the only thing at s… Read More
Alright folks, buckle up because the world has changed once again. Just when we thought we were getting a breather, surprise, Melania Trump is about to drop a memoir! That’s right, Mel… Read More
Why hasn’t Obama endorsed Kamala Harris yet? That’s the million-dollar question – or as it’s currently adjusted for inflation: the $1,000,050 question. You see, it&rs… Read More
Hold your hats, folks! The House GOP is back in the news. You know, whenever I hear this, I brace myself for the imminent train wreck of logic that makes my head spin faster than a kid hyped… Read More
Alright, folks, gather ’round! Let’s talk about this interstellar, out-of-this-world news. Governor Pritzker of Illinois managed to secure a whopping $1 billion in quantum techno… Read More
Here we go again, folks! Another day, another mind-boggling news cycle. So, Biden says it’s time for ‘fresh voices,’ and Netanyahu defends Israel. Well, isn’t that ju… Read More
Alright, so Sam Altman, Mr. CEO of OpenAI himself, is apparently losing sleep over China beating the U.S. in artificial intelligence. And I have to ask, Sam, have you tried Nyquil? Let&rsquo… Read More
Are you sitting down? Because you’re about to hear something that’s going to make you question the very fabric of reality. Picture this: Logan Paul, the YouTube star who once fil… Read More
You know what’s absolutely hilarious? Joe Biden’s presidency. No, seriously, it’s like a never-ending symphony of political shenanigans, composed by a maestro who thinks cl… Read More
Louisiana, Y’all have really outdone yourselves this time. The state famous for jazz, gators, and a cuisine that could choke a giraffe has now reclassified drugs used in abortions as … Read More
It’s a miracle! The U.K. has decided, for once, to not blindly follow the U.S. like a sheep led to the slaughterhouse. It’s refreshing, really. Like seeing a British person admit… Read More
So, New York City’s rolling out gun-detecting technology in the subway system. Genius! Because if there’s one place that needs more excitement, it’s definitely the subway… Read More
In case you haven’t noticed, it’s getting hotter than a microwave in a foundry. We’ve got companies all over the place scrambling to figure out how to keep running without… Read More
Well, well, well, here we are again. The economy, that fickle beast, apparently has extended its two-year growth streak. Yes, folks, we did it. For the second quarter in a row, we’re r… Read More
You know, just when you think politics can’t get any more absurd, along comes Project 2025, and who do we have to thank for making it impossible for Trump to avoid this circus? J.D. Va… Read More
You know, this whole thing with Benjamin Netanyahu addressing Congress is like watching an ongoing political sitcom. It’s like unveiling a hybrid version of “The Office” an… Read More
Look, we’ve all been there: stuck at a dinner party while Uncle Fred drones on about his glory days, adding a mountain of embellishments that make you question the laws of time and spa… Read More
Alright folks, gather around! Let’s talk about the latest, greatest fix for the American education system: microschools. What’s that, you ask? Oh, it’s the Frankenstein of… Read More
If there’s one thing Americans love more than hot dogs on the Fourth of July, it’s politicians who can barely keep their egos in check. Enter Joe Biden, the guy who pulled off th… Read More
Oh, swing states. The swingiest swings that ever swung. The political equivalent of a seesaw teetering on the edge of sanity. And into this circus of madness steps Kamala Harris. Because not… Read More
Folks, we’ve reached a new chapter in our ongoing saga of human laziness. You thought smart homes were the peak? That Alexa ordering your toilet paper was as good as it gets? Nope, buc… Read More
Dear United Kingdom,
First off, let me say — it’s been a wild ride. We’ve shared a lot over the years: tea, cricket (which we still don’t understand, by the way)… Read More
Ladies and Gentlemen, gather around, because we need to talk about something that’s confusing, ridiculous, and emblematic of our times. No, I’m not talking about the latest TikTo… Read More
California has laws, folks. They’ve got laws so shiny and gleaming you could use them to blind Elon Musk on his way to the next moon landing. One of their proudest laws, their pi&egrav… Read More
So, it looks like Trump has picked J.D. Vance as his VP. You know, the author of “Hillbilly Elegy.” Because what the Trump administration really needed was another guy who can wr… Read More
You know, just when you think you’re living in the most vibrant, advanced society in human history, you realize we’re actually on a never-ending episode of Candid Camera. And who… Read More
If you haven’t heard of ‘grocery store tourism’, then let me introduce you to the greatest adventure you never knew you needed. Forget Paris, Rome, or Tokyo; the real cultu… Read More
We live in a country where you can return anything—you can return your toaster, your Roomba, heck, you can even return that ugly sweater your aunt got you for Christmas without even so… Read More
Let’s take a minute to digest this: Trump, yes, the same guy who thought nuking hurricanes might be a good idea, is sharing a letter from Mahmoud Abbas before his big meeting with Neta… Read More
Well, folks, here we are, living in the future. And I’m not talking about flying cars or robot butlers—although, let’s be honest, we all want a robot butler named Jeeves. N… Read More
Well, well, well! Just when you thought politicians couldn’t get any more outrageous, here comes JD Vance, making a splash in history… but not the good kind. Nope. This guy&rsqu… Read More
Oh, the drama! My eyes rolled so hard when I read that headline, I nearly gave myself vertigo. Elon Musk denies donating $45 million a month to Trump’s Super PAC. As if he needs to den… Read More
Well, folks, it’s happening again. Florida, the state that’s basically America’s strange uncle who lives under power lines and collects refrigerator magnets, is back at it… Read More
Alright, folks, buckle up, because today we’re diving headfirst into the geopolitical soap opera that’s got more drama than The Bachelor finale. You know it’s serious when… Read More
Have you ever come across something so ludicrous that you can’t help but wonder if it’s a work of sheer brilliance or the ramblings of someone who has had one too many espresso s… Read More
Let me tell you something, brother. We are living in a golden age of nonsense, where reality and satire hold hands and skip merrily into the sunset. And nothing – absolutely nothing &n… Read More
