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Why School Deadname Policies are wrong: "If a child cannot discuss their identity with their parents, the problem is with the parents, not the child"

I found both of these posts so shocking. 

The first one is a reminder about AIDS and how only within the last 20 years has our society learned to respect gender identity and gender expression. 
Post by @beingliberal
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The AIDS crisis was a terrible time - and the casual cruelty experienced by LGBT people was so shameful.  

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The second post is about how our society is reverting back to that terrible time, as conservatives seize on LBGT as a Culture War issue:
And its happening in Canada too. Our Conservative politicians are pandering to the far right in New Brunswick and in Saskatchewan --and soon to come to Ontario and to the CPC convention - by promoting School policies which the media describes as innocuous "pronoun policies" but which are actually hostile "deadname policies".
Too many Canadian voters do not see these policies for what they are - a political pander to anti-trans homophobia. The Conservative goal here is a political one, not a social one. They aren't trying to protect parents' rights, but rather to create another culture war front. 
In his article The Culture Wars Heat Up Canada - and Kids are Caught in the Middle, David Moscrop writes: 
...  The Conservative Party of Canada—way up in the polls and dominating the discourse on economic issues—has decided to double down on culture war. Why? Ostensibly because they care about “freedom.” But the situation reads more like they just can’t help themselves, which is to say that their conception of freedom is rooted in a moral panic and exclusionary politics that demonize social groups that fall outside their accepted mainstream. 
Where their hatred comes from—fear, resentment, unfamiliarity, irrational prejudice—is important to understand, but secondary to the given that in a pluralist democracy, we ought to extend and protect maximal rights to exist and conditions to flourish to those who make up the textured reality of our world. 
... There’s plenty of opposition to the policy in the prairies, and these measures will meet with prolonged resistance, and almost certain court challenges. They ought to. If a child is uncomfortable discussing their name, preferred pronouns, and identity with their parents, the problem is with the parents, not the child. [emphasis mine]... 
Ontario school principals are sending a message to Ford - "don't you do it!"
The Council statement describes why a deadname policy is so harmful:
While we believe that the ideal situation would include parents and guardians in the conversations and decision making, we support current school board policy in Ontario that centers the students in the decision making and honours their right to self-identify, even when parental consent is not given, to support an equitable and inclusive learning environment. Students who do not have parental, family and community support that respects and validates them face higher risks of self-harm, emotional distress, isolation, deteriorating mental health and increased bullying. Gender-affirming practices such as honouring preferred names and pronouns help to reduce those risks and contribute to greater inclusion, belonging and success at school. 
This is the kind of thoughtful, articulate, student-centred policy that schools want.
And what the Saskatchewan public needs to understand now is that our deadname policy has nothing to do with what schools want. 
It's just a cynical distraction from Sask Party electoral woes:
But real people are being damaged by the anti-trans agenda. In his post Looking Forward, Looking Back, Parker Molloy writes: 
... In a lot of ways, things are significantly worse for trans people today than they were a decade ago. No longer curiosities that mostly flew under the radar, we’ve become a group that politicians and the press have decided to target with unrelenting hate campaigns, restrictive new laws, and other eliminationist bullshit wrapped up in faux concerns about “fairness in sports” and “the children.” 
We are constantly being talked about, often as some sort of problem to be “solved,” but very rarely do we actually get to do the talking. 
 Molloy goes on to highlight some recent posts and articles where trans people do get to talk - all of these are worth reading: 
Niko Stratis Always The Topic, Rarely The Voice 
Evan Urquhart blog Assigned Media 
Erin Reed substack Erin In The Morning 
Ari Drennan The San Bernardino Pride flag murderer and the inevitable consequences of right wing media hate 
Soleil Ho Inside the New York Times’ trans coverage: ‘I wonder if people at the top fully believe in trans people’s humanity’ 

And on a side note, I am noticing there is a new term being used by the media now for anti-gay and anti-trans homophobes -- instead of using a pejorative descriptions like "homophobe" and "TERF" (trans-exclusionary radical feminists), media are now using the more innocuous term "gender-critical feminism" or just "gender-critical". 
Sounds mild - almost intellectual - doesn't it?
Its not:


This post first appeared on Cathie From Canada, please read the originial post: here

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Why School Deadname Policies are wrong: "If a child cannot discuss their identity with their parents, the problem is with the parents, not the child"

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