Watchmen
Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons’ seminal comic becomes a blindly faithful film adaptation, opening an argument that the movie falls into the precise nostalgic traps that the comic warned everyone about. But beyond the meta-commentary that drove Alan Moore deeper into the shadows of Northampton, Watchmen looks at a world where real costumed heroes sprang forth, inspired by the fictions of this altered time.
It’s a world where the Vietnam War ends with a literal deus ex machina as Doctor Manhattan (Billy Crudup) begins to grasp the impact his godlike superpowers will have on the future. It’s a world where the cynical Comedian (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) becomes a hired gun for conservative politicians, even assassinating presidents, until he comes up against a horrifying truth. It’s a world where control is exerted by always giving the people something to fear and attack—and here is where the real world truth of this alternate history hides. Not even our heroes are immune to the twin powers of nostalgia and hate. Power and corruption. Heroes, they’re just like us.
Six-String Samurai
Fans of Fallout: New Vegas, you owe it to yourself to find and watch a cult rarity named Six-String Samurai. This alternate history scenario will feel just like home. Here the nukes went flying in the bucolic ‘50s, and the remaining survivors live hardscrabble lives among the irradiated rubble. Las Vegas, now Lost Vegas, is one of the last strongholds in America, and King Elvis has reigned for 40 rocking and rolling years, dying in peace as the man that saved his people.
But Vegas needs a new ruler, and what we can only describe as the incarnated spirits of Buddy Holly, Slash, and Ritchie Valens are loose in the wastes. It’s Buddy that’s our hero, further adding a Lone Wolf and Cub by way of Mad Max flavor to the proceedings by taking a nameless Kid under his wing. It’s the sort of film best enjoyed with some medicinal help. We’re not kidding, by the way, you’re going to fire up your gaming system of choice to revisit New Vegas as soon as the credits roll. Hurry up before Starfield launches!
X-Men: Days of Future Past
Like Watchmen, but also very much not like that at all, the X-Men have to get to work preventing a Sentinel-ridden future by meddling with the past. Comic fans, yes, we’re still mad about sidelining Kitty Pryde in favor of Wolverine in this adaptation of a classic storyline, but when you’ve got Hugh Jackman and 30-plus years of Marvel overusing the ol’ Canadian shredder against you, it’s understandable.
It’s a timeline where Magneto (Michael Fassbender and Sir Ian McKellen, timeline depending) has seemingly killed JFK and is marinating in jail for it. The Vietnam War is at its peak, and Mystique (Jennifer Lawrence) is using the social and political chaos to get in close to the Nixon White House where she’ll assassinate the Sentinel program director Bolivar Trask (Peter Dinklage). It’s Magneto that gets it right once again, then, and instead arrives on the scene to target Nixon. There’s a bunch of other mishegas going on, and, to save the future, Nixon needs to survive. Come on, though. Let’s enjoy the moment. Without Nixon, there’s no Reagan. With no Reagan, there’s no decades of packing the Supreme Court just to screw us all now. Cue up Just Like Heaven by The Cure.
