Samson and Rita (names not real) got married for over ten years and the union was blessed with three children. When they had issues, the Wife was quick to tell her husband to his face that she would kill him.
Whenever she made such utterance, it frightened the man. And to be in a safer side, he would send her out of the house. But his relatives and hers, together with neighbours, friends and wishers would come begging him to bring her back.
In order not to offend them or be seen as a stubborn man, he would bring her back. The people had been assuring him that she was just talking, she could not harm him. “Your wife said that out of anger, she couldn't kill even an ant,” they would tell him.
With that, the man decided to stay with his wife come what may. Yes, he had been told that marriage is for better for worst. So whatever the Situation; the good, the bad and the ugly, he made up his mind to stick to the marriage. That was a good decision, you might say. I also thought alone that line.
They did not stop fighting and insulting each other, yet they continued to stay as husband and wife.
ALDO READ: Reflections: When divorce is inevitable (1)
After one of such quarrels, the unexpected happened. When the man was far in his sleep, she took a knife and descended heavily in his stomach which paved way for the intestine. In a nutshell, he died painfully in the pool of his blood.
The woman was arrested, taken to court and was sentenced to life imprisonment. The current situation in the family is; the man is dead, the woman is serving a jail term of life imprisonment and the three children are scattered among the relatives without father and mother. Is Divorce not better than that?
That is the story that the old man gave me and ended up with that question. That was where I got Baba's point that in some situations, divorce is the best option.
Now this is my message; never put temporary people in the permanent place of your life, and don't be afraid of removing the wrong people from the right place of your life. If it's your life, then it's your right.
Be bold to take any decision concerning your life. If they call it pride, tell them it's your class and principle. No matter the economy of the jungle, lions will never eat grass. It's not pride, that's their nature.
ALDO READ: Reflections: When divorce is inevitable (1)
Even if education is free, a rat will never go to the same school with a cat. You cannot go anywhere with negative people. Negative people are like cars without fuel and engines. You can only sit in them, but they will never take you anywhere.You cannot change what you see until you learn from what you see. Be careful who you open up to. Only a few people care. The rest just want to have something to gossip about.
Some people come into your life like a dark storming night. When the storm is over and the sun rises, it becomes a beautiful day. Make beautiful days in your life by removing the “storms” in your life.
Where were the people who begged Samson to bring back his wife? Where were they when she was stabbing him to death? Probably they might be out there enjoying themselves while he was in pains dying.
My concern with some of these people is that they cannot do what they are begging you to do. They are the perfect type of; do what I say, but don't do what I do.
I am not saying that people should not intervene in marriages with the aim of keeping it alive. Of course, since from my children, I have never heard people telling a man to divorce his wife no matter the situation. They focus on reconciliation, which I am not by any way against it.
But you as the man, you know deeply well whether that woman you call your wife will either build or destroy you. It's your house, hence you know, more than anybody else, where the roof links. People will surely beg you to keep staying with her, it's left for you to use your brains to decide what's good for you.
Likewise you the woman. You don't need to stay in torment in that house until the man you call your husband kills you. Nothing is worth your life; not even marriage.
The decision of late Samson not to divorce his wife was what had ruined his life, that of his wife and their children. Sometimes, letting go can save a lot of unwanted situations. What do you think?
