It has been a while and so much has happened. To be honest I have been very discouraged. Just when I seemed on the brink of new life and healing, my Lyme disease got worse. Or maybe my adrenals are just plain conking out from the stress. I am also struggling to work and now I may have a very serious arrhythmia so I will be wearing an event monitor for 21 days.
It gets worse. At the Lyme clinic were I work, I see lots of mums who have passed Lyme disease (unknowingly) to their children. This is something that has haunted me for the last five years. I have always know this could be a possibility with Lauren since I had Lyme for so long.We finally had Lauren tested and she is positive for Lyme, Mycoplasma and EBV. Mike and I just sort of fell apart when we found out. This has been life altering, financially draining, and a daily challenge for me and now my precious daughter has it too.
As I feel so low I have to remind myself to look for God's goodness. Psalm 34:8 says,
"Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him."
So I shall not fight, but instead take refuge in Him, my Papa. I will look for signs of His goodness. And I see them everywhere. I am still finding things to be thankful for - even taking a walk to capture a pretty flower. He is with me. He is good.