One thing I can say as a Parent of a sensational kid is that it's easy to incur the judgement of other parents. Looking at some of the behaviors of some of our kids, some people just see brats. In Miller's example, LaTanya's teacher Miss Sorensen "doesn't say so, but she thinks the real problem with the girl is that her parents aren't strict enough and fail to make LaTanya do what she should".
I know for a fact that Katie's father and his wife have thought this of me many times over the years. Much of the time when Katie is at their house for the weekend she controls a lot of her behavior out of intimidation. She can hold it together for 48 hours if she isn't pressed too hard, but at home, where she feels safe, all that pent up "stuff" comes pouring out and we have some tough Sunday nights sometimes. Her dad thinks I baby Katie and let her get away with too much. I know it can look that way from the outside.
The problem is that this holds a child with a disability (man, it's still not easy to say that about my own child) to the expectations of a Typically Developing child, and it's just not the same. They aren't playing with the same equipment. "Humans typically use reason to override reflexive behavior- thinking through situations in order to avoid getting to the 'fight/flight' mode unnecessarily. The problem for (Katie) is that her 'fight/flight' response occurs so fast she doesn't have time to cancel it out with reason. As a result, she (reacts) to situations that aren't really dangerous". (Miller, Sensational Kids)
When someone calls a Typically developing kid a name, that kid can stop and think "Oh that's just Mikey- he's always causing trouble" and brush it off, but, when someone calls Katie a name, she immediately reacts in a way that is beyond what is expected in the Situation, because she doesn't have time to apply reason the way we'd expect someone her age to. So she looks like a brat. Her behavior seems babyish. She looks like a spaz, a freak, a weirdo. She doesn't want to respond this way, it's just the way she's wired!
I know for a fact that Katie's father and his wife have thought this of me many times over the years. Much of the time when Katie is at their house for the weekend she controls a lot of her behavior out of intimidation. She can hold it together for 48 hours if she isn't pressed too hard, but at home, where she feels safe, all that pent up "stuff" comes pouring out and we have some tough Sunday nights sometimes. Her dad thinks I baby Katie and let her get away with too much. I know it can look that way from the outside.
The problem is that this holds a child with a disability (man, it's still not easy to say that about my own child) to the expectations of a Typically Developing child, and it's just not the same. They aren't playing with the same equipment. "Humans typically use reason to override reflexive behavior- thinking through situations in order to avoid getting to the 'fight/flight' mode unnecessarily. The problem for (Katie) is that her 'fight/flight' response occurs so fast she doesn't have time to cancel it out with reason. As a result, she (reacts) to situations that aren't really dangerous". (Miller, Sensational Kids)
When someone calls a Typically developing kid a name, that kid can stop and think "Oh that's just Mikey- he's always causing trouble" and brush it off, but, when someone calls Katie a name, she immediately reacts in a way that is beyond what is expected in the Situation, because she doesn't have time to apply reason the way we'd expect someone her age to. So she looks like a brat. Her behavior seems babyish. She looks like a spaz, a freak, a weirdo. She doesn't want to respond this way, it's just the way she's wired!
This post first appeared on Pieces Of Our Puzzle: Recognizing Sensory Processing Disorder, please read the originial post: here
