This Body of mine and I, we’ve had a lot of ups and downs.
I’ve spent so many moments being so hard on myself. There’s been weight gain, not enough weight loss, Hitting Goals, not hitting goals and the way that I hated how I looked in certain pieces of clothing.
I’ve spent to much time comparing. I’ve watched everyone around me and wondered what their secrets were. I’ve envied the way others carried themselves, the confidence they exuded and their ability to just drop weight so simply.
Last summer things shifted whenever I vowed to wear a bikini no matter what. I kept that promise to myself and everything that it stood for in my life, but there was still progress to be made. (Though, isn’t there always?) We knew that we were ready to take the leap to becoming parents of one to parents to two and make B a big brother in 2016, so I made careful adjustments to both my diet and fitness routine to start preparing my body for that journey. I wanted both my body and my ability to bounce back after having our second child to be different this time around.
//Tank: c/o Nom Collection // Shorts c/o Nom collection //
Not that things weren’t great after I had B (in fact, being only 21 I bounced back pretty quickly without trying), but goodness knows each pregnancy is so, so different. With our little guy, I barely posed for any pictures and didn’t want to be in front of the camera due to pretty much being pregnant head to toe. This time, I’ve been showing my little bowling ball off and super proud of the body challenges I have overcome to get to this point.
But it didn’t stop there.
This time around our whole family has been Watching my belly grow. If you know my story, you know that Chris was away in the military for much of my pregnancy with B, seeing me about once a month until he was born and we moved in together off base. But everything is different now and my little family is counting on my body to grow a healthy baby girl and watching in anticipation as that happens. I’m literally growing a human inside me and the experience of watching that happen together has been so amazing within itself.
It’s buried deep within these moments that I have gained the strength I have always yearned for my entire life to just be kind to myself and Love the miracles that this body has produced: Branden and Baby Girl Cooper. And not to forget, my husband loves every inch of my body. Head to toe, all the parts that I can’t stand when I look in the mirror. I should be able to love myself the way that the most important people to me in the world do. Nothing is truer than that.
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